Author: jenluerssen

Salty? I mean, it’s better than “f*cking” or “just” but I think it paints an inaccurate picture of my genial personality. I’m assuming that “sexy” or “sophisticated” were too pedestrian or already taken. Joe tells me that I can pretend it’s about how I taste. I ignore that affable deviant as much as possible. Generally, I’m a pretty easy going and friendly guy. My new intern, Kit calls me “Salty” … me “Salty” and so I guess it’s a thing now. Joe says I tend to act like an ass around women I’m attracted to.Am I attracted to Kit? Hell…

Hey there, beautiful! I’m Joe, just Joe, not like that asshole with a heart of gold, F-cking Frank. Hope you’re not too disappointed that I kept my abs under wraps, I’m no show off. Check out the guns, though, am I right?Really, my abs would have distracted you too much away from my handsome face, and that would have been a travesty. I am the full package—handsome, built, funny, charming. You … You could say I’m a little full of myself, but I’m just honest. We are always told to build our self confidence and believe in ourselves. Then you…

I’m F*cking Frank (yeah there’s an asterisk, worked for that kids book, didn’t it?) and this book is about me and Mikey. You’d probably rather be in Mikey’s head since she’s not as much of an asshole, but unfortunately, the author finds me more interesting. Mikey and I were literally separated at birth, and when we get back together, it’s pretty great. She could do way better, but who am I to set … to set her standards? I make music, she makes wine. Together we mostly argue and fck (jeez, even here an asterisk?), so you know, we’re perfect…