Tragedy brought us together, but something stronger made me want to stay.”
Julian was the boy next door. My brother’s best friend, he fit with my family in ways I never could. While he and Rhett went on to play house, I left the only life I knew, desperate for a fresh start.
Until everything changed.
Heartache came along, and the aftermath of my brother’s death was here to stay. I was now face … to stay. I was now face to face with Julian more than I ever wanted to be.
Being around him brought up all my insecurities, forced me to deal with hard truths, and conjured up feelings I had no business entertaining. He wasn’t the man I thought I knew. He was complex and layered, and inherently beautiful in all the ways I’d never noticed.
Not on another person.
Not on another man.
Not until him.
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This is hands down one of my top 5 favorite reads of 2020, thus far.
Without You is a beautiful and emotional read focusing on grief, family, finding one’s self, recognizing one’s value and worth, and letting love in…no matter its form and no matter the odds stacked against it.
This book gripped my heart from the very first page, and it will stay with me for a long time. I laughed. I cried. I had my heart broken. And I fell in love with Julian and Deacon.
Both heartbreaking and full of hope, Without You will be placed on my reread shelf!
I knew that my heartstrings were going to be pulled. And boy were they ever. Marley captures the raw emotions of a person’s grief in this heavy and emotional story.
The pain was palpable that I wanted to hug both Julian and Deacon. I wanted them to heal and find happiness. Deacon and Julian’s relationship was unexpected. I didn’t quite feel the chemistry between them at first. Once I started to and liking the characters it was over so soon. I’d have liked if more time was spend on basking in their happiness. There was too much hurt to have it over so quickly. Things happened rather fast. Julian and Deacon went from almost strangers/enemies to lovers within a short time. I prefer a slower pace, especially since Deacon went from straight to gay and falling in love with his dead brother’s boyfriend. There was more I wanted to see. I think the book could have been a bit longer to make it better.
There were scenes that I enjoyed very much. Also, I loved that Deacon didn’t feel unease or awkward for feeling attracted to Julian. It felt natural like they were meant to be with each other.
5 HEART WRENCHING STARS!! This story will touch all your heart with all the feels. Julian and Deacon’s story is beautifully written and heart wrenching, but so worth the time. Marley Valentine is a beautiful storyteller and sucks us readers into the story. I highly recommend this book….it is true love.
This was my first mm read and I’m so grateful that this was it. I couldn’t put down because the story line had me hooked, when I expected something it would go a different way and I loved it. one lost the love of his life the other never thinking he was good enough and never feeling loved by his family. Always envious of his brother and boyfriend. When his brother passes he sees a side of Julian that he never saw before vulnerability. A year passes and the family is brought together again, a slow but eventual friendship occurs between these two. There is an obvious attraction between deacon and Julian which both feel but deacon has never been with another man. As time passes the feelings grow stronger and it’s just not physical but emotional attractions. This was an emotional rollercoaster until the end and I couldn’t stop crying. The ending had me wanting more. I received this as an arc to give an honest opinion and wow I couldn’t highly recommend this beautiful love story of two people that just wanted to be loved in all possible ways.
Holy wow. Trying to come up with words to describe my feelings for this book is not easy. SO. MANY. FEELINGS.
I was really worried about this one, y’all. Whenever there’s a deceased spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend, I always worry that the current love will somehow be placed in the “consolation prize” category and I hate that. I’m super picky because I need to feel like the current couple is completely meant to be and I know that’s not an easy thing for an author to make me feel. Marley Valentine pulled this off in spades! I NEVER, not for one second, felt like Deacon was second best. And I completely believed that everything happened exactly as it was fated to happen because Deacon and Julian were destined to be together. So big, big kudos to the author for the way she portrayed that. Also, she needs to never stop writing M/M because she does that fabulously.
The story of Deacon and Julian put me through the ringer but left me with a happy heart. These beautiful men fought through pain and dealt with all kinds of trauma, resentment and guilt to get through to the end of their story. It was real and raw and just a glorious thing to behold. I absolutely loved it and highly recommend it. It’s a journey you won’t regret.
Julian is Deacon’s brother’s best friend so they have known each other for some time. They don’t see each other for some years due to living their lives. Now a tragic event has brought them together. I loved seeing how this couple’s journey unfolded for them. A beautiful and steamy hot mm romance.
My first read by this author but it certainly won’t be my last one. I really enjoy MM books so definitely was looking forward to reading this story. It was a good emotional story that will get you feeling all the emotions!
Deacon has lost his brother and Julian not only his best friend but his boyfriend. That’s about the only thing they seem to have in common but the more they spend time together, the more they realise that there is so much more than meets the eye. Although both still are reeling from their loss, they find common ground and it gets harder for them to ignore what is trying to reach the surface. But Deacon has never felt something more for men and it’s hard to realise that his feelings truly are real towards Julian. Their relationship keeps on evolving and their bond is getting stronger. Will they find their way to each other?…
Deacon has always had a strained relationship with his family (mostly his mother) and has always felt like he was living in his little brother’s shadow. When his brother passes away that strain becomes even worse. He distances himself from his family even further. On the one year anniversary of his brother’s passing he comes home to visit his family and attend services for his brother. When he comes home he comes face to face with his brother’s boyfriend, Julian. A man that he didn’t like out of nothing but pure jealousy. But this time, they both see each other differently and life isn’t the same for either of them.
I finished this book at 11PM at night. I woke up the next morning at 3:30AM and couldn’t get Deacon and Julian out of my mind. This story was so not what I was expecting. It was an emotional storm that I was not prepared for; it gutted me. I am pretty sure each chapter had me in tears. Seeing how they each handled their grief differently was heart wrenching. I just wanted to hug them both. And their guilt, oh their guilt, it was so heavy you could feel it. But then Marley put me back together. When they came together and realized they could be together and were allowed to be happy together – oh man was it beautiful. It took them a year to get there, but they healed each other and it was captivating. These men made me smile and made my heart happy. These men are so damn amazing. I am blown away by them. And their chemistry? It was palpable. You need to get your grabby hands on this one because I want to you all to love Deacon and Julian as much as I do. I absolutely loath Deacon’s mother (if you can call her that) and am a bit sad that her issues were just brushed under the rug. I would have liked to understand why she was the way she was. That being said, I am pretty sure my favorite character was Wade’s wife. What was her name? Oh yeah . . . Christy. Good name. Get some tissues and get this one. You won’t regret it.
I need to read more books by the author because I love how much soul and feelings she puts in her books.
Life is always unpredictable and it can change in a matter of seconds for everyone.
I loved this story and the journey both Deacon and Julian took to find themselves again and also find love with each other.
My favorite reads are those that reach inside my heart and soul and bring emotions bubbling to the surface; whether it be love, pain, loss, heartache or heartbreak, I absolutely want all the feels! Without You by Marley Valentine is 100% such a read. Unexpectedly brought together by grief and loss, Deacon and Julian find themselves and their relationship in uncharted waters. Julian is Deacon’s brother’s best friend. The boy that made Deacon feel things he didn’t want to feel. And Deacon is Rhett’s older brother. The boy Julian’s now seeing in ways that he doesn’t understand. These two completely captured my heart. To Marley – Thank you for bringing me these beautiful, broken men. Their connection on both an emotional and physical level shines through. The depth of emotion and care you paid to these characters as they fought for their HEA is beyond measure. I laughed and cried, and you showed me how love is not only healing, but transcends all. I can’t wait for everyone to meet Deacon and Julian.
What a truly remarkable read…. from beginning to end this book had me completely consumed. Without You was a such an honest read surrounding grief and loss and finding love again in the most unexpected place. Seriously, I was sobbing one minute and laughing the next you feel EVERYTHING as you go on this journey with Deacon and Julian. I cannot say enough how absolutely wonderful this book was; definitely a must read.
Oh, my heart. There are a fair amount of people who have told me that M/M romances tend to be mostly about sex. I know for a fact that isn’t true, and my latest bit of evidence is none other than Marley Valentine’s Without You. This was, hands down, one of the most heartrending yet soul-healing novels I’ve ever had the privilege of reading. Julian’s life after the loss of Rhett had him in limbo, while Deacon’s own relationship with his family, particularly with his mother, had him in his own purgatory. The main thing that tied Deacon and Julian together was their love for Rhett, but I appreciated that the author didn’t use that is the impetus for these two to forge a friendship. If anything, there was an organic feeling to the growth and evolution of their relationship, and I loved having this front-row seat to them creating their own bit of history together. Aside from being a romance, this book was also about family–both the one we’re born into and the one we create for ourselves. I won’t suggest you add Without You to your to-be-read list ASAP; rather, I seriously recommend you read it NOW. This gets five-plus stars.
“I love you more than my past,” he says. “I love you more than the obstacles the present has thrown in our way. Because you’re my future. And I’m going to love you forever because you’re my always.”
Without You is a heavy book and I don’t mean in a literal way. I knew going in that we were already going to be dealing with the loss of a loved one and the stages of grief that comes with the territory, but what I didn’t know was the absolute toxic dysfunction that is Deacon’s relationship with his mother. My heart aches for the boy who just wanted to be good enough. Because he was always made to feel less than by his mother, he’s got some serious issues with self esteem for the better part of the book. Mix that with falling for your dead brother’s boyfriend and you got a huge load of guilt and shame.
I loved the portrayal of different kinds of grief in this book. Grief is different for everyone so it was realistic to see it written as such.
“You’re the beat of my heart, the blood in my veins, the strength in my bones. None of me works without you. And if you need me to tell you every fucking day for the rest of our lives, then I will because you are more than enough. You’re everything.”
I found Deacon and Julian’s relationship to be not as forbidden as I thought. Once they gave in to each other, they went all in. It was a very fast paced relationship but that didn’t bother me at all. They compliment each other very well and in the end they were cute.
“Get on your back,” he demands. “I want you to remember my face when I fuck you. So you know exactly who you’re walking away from, and the man you better fucking come back to.”
And in case you were wondering, the smut was good. There wasn’t a lot of it in my opinion. I’m reading another Marley Valentine MM romance and it is way smuttier than this one but because of the themes of grief and learning to go on living, it feels appropriate to not have smut overload.
Now I know you are wondering, why four stars and not five? There was this scene at about 93% of the way in. It happened, it angered me, and I wanted to punch a certain character in the throat. But what I really didn’t like was the fact that after everything happened, it was brushed over very quickly and to me there was no satisfying conclusion. Sure this character is going to seek help. Great! But then it’s “the end”? I would have loved to have seen an epilogue where these two broken people come back together, talk shit out, and make plans to better their relationship in the future. Instead I’m left with a bitter taste in my mouth over the whole thing.
Overall rating 4 stars
Steaminess 3 stars
Without You by Marley Valentine is a torturing, delicious and heartaching MM Romance. It’s a complete angst fest that made me hurt so good!
Deacon Sutton has always been the other son to his mother because his little brother Rhett was always been perfect in her eyes. Now after his death from leaukemia, he has lost himself in darkness completely. He is grieving himself and doesn’t know how to handle the pain. And then he meets Julian. His dead brother’s boyfriend. And someone who made him feel alive after a long time. Someone who needs his support like he does. Someone who is off limits.
As I said, this story made me break down so many times. I could literally feel the positive and earth shattering connection between Deacon and Julian right in my heart and bones. My heart breaks for Deacon who never felt worthy till Julian made him feel loved and cherished. I am angry and heartbroken for the unfairness for the situation. My heart breaks for Julian. He lost his best friend and now he is dealing with the overwhelming guilt about having feelings for Deacon. But no one ever made him feel this intense feeling. The writing brings out the confusing emotions and chaotic feelings perfectly! Their chemistry is scorching hot!
Without You by Marley Valentine was a beautifully aching romance. All the emotions. All the love. All the romance. An unforgettable MM romance for me.
Received ARC for honest review
This is one of these books that will stick with me for a long time. I went into this book blind, had no clue what the blurb was or what the characters were named and loved every minute of it!! This is a story about a broken family.. Deacon hasn’t had it easy in his family and it’s only gotten worse since his brother is gone. His parents treat him horribly especially his mom and his only saving grace is his sister and niece Lia. Coming home to grieve was supposed to be short but he finds himself drawn to Julian, his brother’s best friend/partner. I get the feeling that despite Julian taking care of Rhett, there is more to there story. I got the feeling while reading that it was more of an emotional and caring relationship rather then physical between Rhett and Julian. Anyway back to the story, both characters bought a lot to the story and were in despite need of healing. They had a way of talking and comforting each other that I don’t think the parents had. Deacon wanted to see more in life for Julian and while he pushed him, he was also patient with him. This book was beautifully written with characters that will stay with me for a long time. They have a special piece of my heart! I so loved getting sucked into this book and finding more characters to love!
Plain and simple, straight to the point: This book was STUNNING. Absolutely 100% stunning. All of it. Every single page. Every single word.
I don’t even know how to put into words how much I loved this story and I’m having trouble writing a review that will do it any form of justice. I can tell you that Marley Valentine has so hooked me with her unforgettable characters, heart wrenching love story and poignant writing.
Without You had me captivated from the first passage and took me on a path of discovery with Deacon and Julian….both lost, confused and disillusioned, both finding comfort in the most unlikely of situations. I felt their grief, their loneliness, and the hope that eventually started to seep through. This truly is a love story at it’s best……and it is a credit to the delicate writing of Marley Valentine that I too was so emotionally involved in this journey with them.
This romance was so freaking beautiful and gut-wrenching and the emotional journey between two men that never expected to find love in the face of grief and tragedy. This story is heart wrenching, beautiful, funny, compassionate, intimate, sad, tender and ultimately unputdownable. And Marley writes it all with poise, care, and beautiful insight. Honestly one of the best romances I’ve ever read and one which has left an indelible mark on my heart.
HOLY MOLY!! I’m blown away by Without You by Marley Valentine. This book was emotional and overwhelming in a good way. I am floored and still trying to pick up the pieces of my heart. But the end…perfect.
Deacon and Julian are perfectly imperfect, but there is even more to this than that. They are both suffering, and in their blackness, they find each other. These characters will win your hearts, and you will keep turning the page to see what happens next. I do warn you to have a blanket, a cup of tea (or something stronger), and a box of tissues with you when you read this book. I absolutely loved it, the characters, and the plot. And you will too! 5 stars and I recommend you one-click this one today!
Beautiful, and Captivating! Loved it so much!
This book is absolutely amazing! I thought it was beautiful and captivating! I was so mesmerized by the story I couldn’t put it down. You will see and feel raw emotions as the characters have to deal with losing a loved one. I know this book was tugging at my heart strings. Deacon loses his brother Rhett, and struggles as he wants so desperately to keep his family from falling apart. While Deacon has lost his brother, Julian has lost his boyfriend and is dealing with his day to day struggle without him. Together they find common ground and Deacon finds that there is more to Julian that he cannot deny, an undeniable attraction. This book is sexy, funny, wonderful characters, great chemistry, simply irresistible.
Heartbreakingly Beautiful!
This story is absolutely heartbreaking and utterly beautiful from beginning to end. It is a beautifully written story about finding that second chance love. Every single beautifully written word was done with such feeling and passion. This amazing author has created some very amazing and unforgettable characters who you will fall deeply in love with.
Deacon and Julian are both heartbroken, confused and lost. The worst kind of tragedy has brought them together and forced them to see the goodness in each other. They find comfort and love at a time when they both desperately need it. Deacon and Julius take us on emotional journey through all the good, the bad and the gut wrenching moments.
Phenomenal writing and storytelling with exceptional characters who will forever be etched in my mind. Bravo!
Oh Y’all!! So, I was super excited for this book. I was thinking GAH I mean you can read the blurb and it pretty much sounds like this book is gonna be all kinds of forbidden goodness right? But my friends, this book, this fantastic, beautifully epic book, was beyond any and all expectations I could have ever even imagined.
The feelings and emotional journey Marley will send you on with this book is soul-stirring and powerful. The way this book will grab your heart on the first page, AHH I’m just never going to be the same.
Broken-hearted, defeated and devastated. Deacon and Julian have a story that will both decimate and then heal your heart and soul. This is a poignantly powerful story about the love and healing they found in each other. It was about two broken souls recognizing their perfect counterparts in the most unlikely of places, at the most inopportune time. The kind of inevitable love that even though it went against logic and reason, what should and shouldn’t have drawn them to one another bond them in ways neither could have ever expected. There was something cathartic when they were together, it was as if all was right in the world, it’s why they had to be meant for each other. They way they could tap into what the other so desperately needed at that moment and to be just that.
I’m a firm believer that there is something to be said about the after effects of what happens to you after a book absolutely, utterly wrecks you. That cleansing feeling that only comes after you have bawled and sobbed until your huffing and snotty( not pretty but it happens) But when all is said and done and your author has broken you into a million pieces, you have cried all the tears until you have none left to cry, and she’s put you back together, you sigh and know that everything is as it’s supposed to be. She did it! She broke you, and she put you back together. Now, you do know you won’t be 100 percent the same, because long after these characters will stick with you, because that’s what those types of books do. THIS is one of those books, Deacon and Julian will be here in my heart long after I finished this book. Their story is the ultimate story of where love triumphs all, love wins. Love is EVERYTHING!
*I voluntarily reviewed an advanced complimentary copy of this book!
My Cr8zysockbookblock blog wrap up for this book!
– I urge you to please take a chance on this book. If you never tried a MM or if MM isn’t your usual genre give this a go. Marley Valentine is a master and you will find yourself so caught up in this amazing love story you won’t care or it won’t matter whether it’s MM or MF it’s just a tragically beautiful love story.
-It is hot!! There is so much temptation and at first the try to fight it between them, that it can’t help but to be off the charts hot?!?! Yup, so so HOTT!
Cliffhanger Warning- HEA