“Leavitt has crafted an irresistible portrait of midlife ennui and the magic of breaking free.” –People “With or Without You is a moving novel about twists of fate, the shifting terrain of love, and coming into your own. With tenderness and incisive insight, Leavitt spotlights a woman’s unexpected journey towards her art.” –Madeline Miller, author of Circe A Best Book of the Month: Bustle * … of Circe
A Best Book of the Month: Bustle * PopSugar
New York Times bestselling author Caroline Leavitt writes novels that expertly explore the struggles and conflicts that people face in their search for happiness. For the characters in With or Without You, it seems at first that such happiness can come only at someone else’s expense. Stella is a nurse who has long suppressed her own needs and desires to nurture the dreams of her partner, Simon, the bass player for a rock band that has started to lose its edge. But when Stella gets unexpectedly ill and falls into a coma just as Simon is preparing to fly with his band to Los Angeles for a gig that could revive his career, Simon must learn the meaning of sacrifice, while Stella’s best friend, Libby, a doctor who treats Stella, must also make a difficult choice as the coma wears on.
When Stella at last awakes from her two-month sleep, she emerges into a striking new reality where Simon and Libby have formed an intense bond, and where she discovers that she has acquired a startling artistic talent of her own: the ability to draw portraits of people in which she captures their innermost feelings and desires. Stella’s whole identity, but also her role in her relationships, has been scrambled, and she has the chance to form a new life, one she hadn’t even realized she wanted.
A story of love, loyalty, loss, and resilience, With or Without You is a page-turner that asks the question, What do we owe the other people in our lives, and when does the cost become too great?
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Wow, another phenomenal read. I seem to be on this unexpected binge where every book I read lately just speaks to me on such another level. Are the karma gods trying to tell me something?
WITH OR WITHOUT YOU by @carolineleavitt @algonquinbooks was the most recent book on this journey, and it was unputdownable. I’m sure you won’t be shocked that I read it in one sitting.
It’s about a Stella and Simon, couple who have been together for years that now seem to be in different places in their life. With constant disagreements and arguments, and a new opportunity for Simon which will have him on the road, they are at odds once again. The night before Simon is to fly to California for his big opportunity, Stella takes an unknown pill from Simon, just so that they can both relax and relive the old days when they got along so well.
The next morning, Simon finds Stella in a coma.
Simon stays in NY, holding off on his trip to stay with Stella, reevaluating his relationship with her and realizing how much she means to him. But when months later, Stella finally wakes up, she’s not the same person. She’s acquired likes that were different than before and now has developed a talent for drawing, which is totally new. Stella’s feelings and role in the world have jumbled and unknown, and she is struggling to find her identity. She now has the chance to form a new life, different from before, a life she never realized she wanted. Will this relationship withstand all that’s happened?
A gripping read from the start, Caroline Leavitt writes so realistically that what Stella and Simon are experiencing can be taken right off of a page of one of our own lives. The sacrifices and decisions that both of them make for each other throughout the book gives us pause to evaluate our own relationships. How often do you place others needs before your own? Are we really living the life we want or are we living our life for someone else? If you had the chance for a new life, would you take it?
A page-turner and an eye opener for all of our own relationships, my emotions were all over the place, and I found this to be a brilliant read. Highly recommend.
With or Without You is an adult love story that begins long after a romance novel would’ve faded to ‘happily-ever-after.’
Many other reviewers have laid out the plot and character, so I’m going to concentrate on my emotional response.
In different parts of the book, I identify with each one of the major characters—Libby who, because of her guilt, is living the life her brother was meant to have; Simon who’s dreaming of elusive fame as he ages; Stella who wants a life with Simon, but it’s a life Simon doesn’t want.
The coma that Stella slips into is a neat (and unusual) device for setting up the conflict.
Many of us in long-term relationships recognize what we have as love. We go along and get along. Introspection slips away.
But Stella emerges from her coma suddenly noticing things she’s long taken for granted.
She’s also fragile and destabilized. Her friend Libby, a doctor, and Simon, who’s cared for Stella at the cost of his career, try to be supportive. They’re good people, also flawed as we all are, but the pieces of their lives no longer fit together.
Leavitt provides a satisfying ending that leaves room for “happy” but doesn’t cheat with an easy way out.
This excellent novel, carefully and steadily paced to focus on character change brought about by extraordinary external circumstances, is an intimate study of marital dynamics. Stella and Simon were already feeling the strain of differing desires. Simon, a musician, is still seeking fame, though his band hasn’t made it big and the older he gets, the more hope fades, while Stella, is a nurse in her forties and longing for stability and a baby, no longer interested in road trips for his gigs. When Simon tries to woo her into sharing what he sees as a big chance, he goes too far, and she ends up in a coma. That coma, which stretches from days to weeks to a couple of months, is the crucible for dramatic personality change in both of them. Stella wakes with a talent for and drive to create visual art. Will the changes in each bring them together? One especially interesting theme in this novel is the look at artistic desire and reach, how it affects those who have it, and when and what they’re willing to sacrifice for art in the process of inventing their lives.
With or Without You is a gorgeously crafted tale in Caroline Leavitt’s evocative, lyrical voice. You’ll fall in love with three intertwined characters: Simon, who’s seeking musical fame; Libby, who’s striving to make up for guilt over a childhood tragedy; and Stella, who slips into a coma, and is never again the same. I learned, I gasped, I cried, and read the whole beautiful story in one unforgettable day.
Wow! What a fabulous read! Leavitt has hit the ball out of the park with this one! From start to finish I was hooked on this page turning read, and I didn’t want it to end. I wanted to keep turning pages long after the last one was read.
Simon and Stella are characters that you just easily fall in love with. They are flawed, they are chiseled beautifully and they are perfect for their roles. I felt my heart tug for both of them. I felt my heart twist when Simon had difficult decisions to make. I felt it ache for Stella as she battled her coma and waking up to unknown situations.
These characters and their story absolutely twisted me up and threw me into a wild, emotional roller coaster. When it ended, I was breathless and questioning some of my own choices in life. That’s absolutely amazing when an author can do that to me.
If you want an emotional, roller coaster, page turning novel, then you need to grab this incredibly written book up now. Leavitt has a superb talent for writing a book that plays out like a movie on the big screen. Her novel will envelope you and keep you hooked until the last 4 star page is turned.
*I received a complimentary copy of this book from Author/Publisher and was under no obligation to post a review, positive or negative.* Caroline Leavitt
This book! Oh my heart!It gave me all the feels. I went in thinking..well this sounds pretty good…umm the blurb doesn’t do it justice. I absolutely loved it !!
I connected with Stella immediately… She’s a nurse… so she’s my people! Like so many people, Stella hits her 40s and starts to question her choices… then she makes her biggest mistake… and ends up in a coma
Her experience while in a coma was absolutely fascinating to me! I’ve always wondered what level of awareness the patient has during that time…
I finished up the book marveled at all the changes the coma brought on…to not only Stella but those around her. Her new found desire and talent to paint blew me away.
As I got ready to close the book… I always try to learn a little bit about the author. Upon finding out she had been in a coma herself… I was rendered speechless. It made the book even that more special. The story of regret, change, finding the things that bring you pure joy in your life… I can’t recommend this book enough.
When I heard the quick summary of Caroline Leavitt’s latest novel, I was immediately intrigued. A woman emerges from a coma to find her personality, identity and relationships have completely changed.
The novel alternates between three points of view, Stella, a nurse who goes into a coma after a night of drugs and drinking, her partner, Simon, a bass player for a fading rock band and Libby, a doctor at the hospital where Stella works and also her best friend. The rotating viewpoints allow the reader to see how this unexpected medical crisis affects not only the patient, but everyone within her sphere. As Stella lays unconscious, Simon and Libby form a tenuous bond that further strengthens when Stella awakens a changed person. Before her coma, Stella was an exceptional nurse, but afterwards she no longer finds fulfillment in her chosen career, instead becoming obsessed with doodling on endless pieces of paper. Soon, she is painting portraits and making a name for herself in the New York art scene. The three characters must negotiate the ways their lives have changed in the wake of the coma and figure out how to move forward. Leavitt’s writing is raw, honest and touching. I found myself tearing up more than a few times, a rarity for me when reading. A bonus personal essay at the end of the book entitled “Where Did the Old You Go?”, adds a fascinating emotional dimension to the reading experience.
This book has so much in common with my soon to be released novel, Better to Trust. My novel follows Grant Kaplan, a world renowned neurosurgeon battling a pill addiction who decides to operate on his sister-in-law’s brain. As Alison fights for her life and struggles to recover, she reevaluates what is important to her and what she wants for her future. My novel explores similar themes revolving around medical ethics, family dynamics, trust, and how a medical crisis can forever change the course of lives. Both Leavitt’s novel and my own are perfect for fans of Ask Again, Yes by Mary Beth Keane and Left Neglected by Lisa Genova.
I really enjoyed the writing style and how past events were woven into the present. Leavitt created well developed flawed characters who had tough decisions to make. I loved how we really got to see Stella, Simon, and Libby’s perspectives so the story was not one sided. It is more of a character driven novel, but I couldn’t put it down. It feels weird saying I enjoyed following the aftermath of the decisions they were making because it is an intense read, but it really makes you think about how far you would go to save your relationship when you both are changing. The ending left a couple things open to an extent and normally I like them a little more wrapped up, but I thought the ending worked well for this type of book. An emotional page-turner about love, forgiveness, self discovery and personal growth. I look forward to reading more from this author, highly recommended.
This is a very thought-provoking novel that digs deep into the life changes that we can’t control and gaining control over those we can. The characters are not always likeable, but they are always well-written and there’s a lot of emotional growth that happens for all of them despite their questionable choices at times. The past doesn’t have to define the future is a phrase that comes to mind and I love how that theme was executed in this story. I read it in one sitting and enjoyed every minute of it.
I received a gifted copy in exchange for an honest review.
Thoughts
Stella has been in a relationship with musician Simon for decades. She is ready to take the next step because her biological clock is ticking loudly now that she’s in her 40’s. Simon is packing for a trip to LA because his band is opening for a famous musician, and this is their big shot at making a comeback. They argue, drink wine, and argue some more. Simon doesn’t want the same things Stella wants, but they both agree they want to be the young and carefree couple they used to. With that in mind Simon suggests they take a pill that will calm them both down. Stella, reluctant to take a drug, does it to please her love. He wakes up the next morning, she does not.
Stella wanted marriage and a family before falling into a coma, but after she wakes up she’s different. Everything from food to Simon babying her is starting to get to her. Stella can’t be a nurse again because of her memory, but she doesn’t want to because a new talent has emerged….art. She is now a sought after artist drawing portraits and anything she can. Meanwhile her relationship with Simon is crumbling and he is getting closer and closer to Libby.
Alternating chapters between Simon, Libby, (Stella’s best friend, coworker and doctor) and Stella we see just how one person’s life choices affect those around them. Wow what a read! I loathed Simon at the beginning of this book, but the more he changed his ways the more he grew on me. I can’t imagine how hard it would be to watch the person you love become someone you don’t know anymore. I also can’t imagine how Stella felt after she woke up. Two months of her life are gone, and nothing looks the same or tastes the same.
I won’t say much more, but if you’re looking for a powerful read then look no further.
Thank you Suzy Approved Book Tours and Author Caroline Leavitt for my #copy. Pub Date is June 29th!
Book Rating: 4/5
Wine Pairing: Jacques Girardin Bourgogne Pinot Noir Vieilles Vignes 2017
Caroline Leavitt tackles a fascinating topic in With Or Without You. The pages turned quickly, and yet, when I reached the last page, I wanted to shout: Wait! What happens next?
I fell in love with the story from the first page.
First, I love that this is a story about people who should have their stuff together by now (and by stuff, I mean crap), yet they don’t. These characters are not just out of the gate, yet they have so much to learn.
Loyalty, friendship, love. It’s all here, and sometimes it’s not pretty. And the big one: Coma. Haven’t you ever wondered? Can you see it happening when you read Stella’s story?
And Simon? I fell in love with Simon.
If you haven’t yet read this book, I highly recommend it!
I love the depth of Caroline Leavitt’s writing, and in With or Without You, she goes even deeper than ever before. This story, about a woman who slips into a coma during an evening with her boyfriend, and awakens to an entirely different personality, touched me deeply. Caroline writes with suspense and with understanding and empathy for her characters. I couldn’t put this book down! Beautiful, descriptive, lyrical writing.
When Stella falls into a coma, her lover, Simon, and her best friend, Libby, enter a holding pattern, waiting for her to wake up so they can all resume their lives. But Stella undergoes a profound and dramatic alteration in her personality, waking with a vivid passion to explore life and a brand new talent. Simon and Libby, thrown off balance by the altered dynamic, also move away from their familiar patterns of thought, action, and desire. With or Without You is a mesmerizing book that explores the messiness of relationships, the ripple effects of change, and the glorious possibility that the life we’ve always lived doesn’t have to be the life of our future.
Caroline Leavitt twists your emotions into all manner of intricate knots in this book, leaving you trying to figure out how you feel about her characters and their choices.
Stella, Simon, and Libby each sacrifice something (or some things) important to them, and they have to learn to live with those sacrifices. Stella, for instance, has prioritized her partner Simon’s music career for two decades. On the night before he’s to leave their NYC apartment for a concert in Los Angeles with his never-quite-well-known band, she decides not to accompany him. You know immediately that this is not a customary response from her. But before the ramifications of that decision can be known, Stella falls ill and is in a coma that lasts two months. During her “floating” time, she misses Simon and is desperate to tell him she loves him, even as she pulls further apart. As she remarks later in the book, she has spent half her life waiting for him to grow up.
Stella’s best friend, Libby, is a doctor at the hospital where Stella lies (and where she worked as a nurse). Becoming a physician demands sacrifice of time and relationships, which perhaps is why Libby cherishes her friendship with Stella. Desperate for her to heal, Libby also is desperate for a romantic connection, a feeling that may drive her to make a decision that leads to a particularly painful sacrifice.
And then there is Simon. I’ll admit straight away that I didn’t like him, and I never grew to like him. Even when he and Stella recall their relationship–how much they loved each other, how devoted they were, how faithful–Stella is the one who sublimates herself, letting Simon take the lead. When he wants to tour with his band, he tours with his band, with or without Stella. Simon, I must say, is a spoiled brat. He seeks attention and fame, and when Stella’s deviates from him, he can’t accept it. Stella’s illness, however, forces him to make a sacrifice. Not out of selflessness or love, mind you, but rather due to guilt. The one truly kind thing he does is, again, borne more from guilt than generosity. So I didn’t like him.
Caroline Leavitt treads a line with these characters with which she lets you into their hearts and minds, letting you understand what drives and frightens them. She doesn’t ask you to choose, though. Even Simon (ugh) is presented with sympathy. Instead, she asks that you consider what it means to sacrifice for someone else. What do you do when do those sacrifices cost too much? When is it okay to ask others to sacrifice for you?
I loved this book. I wish I was in a book club so I could talk about it. Please hit up the comments and let me know your thoughts. And now I am going to go check out Caroline Leavitt’s backlist and read more of her books.
Thank you Algonquin for a complimentary copy. I voluntarily reviewed this book. All opinions expressed are my own.
With Or Without You
By: Caroline Leavitt
REVIEW
With Or Without You by Caroline Leavitt is the type of story that slaps you across the face, for me at least. It’s like a loud ringing bell that draws attention to something important. I’m in my early forties, married for twenty years and see parts of myself in this story. Simon and Stella were different people when they met twenty years ago, and change is inevitable. They are quietly unnoticed, these disparate dreams, until one day you wake up and think, “How did I end up here?”. Dreams and goals morph into different things both expected and unexpected. We change as people, too, but it’s easier to pretend everything is the same. Embracing change is scary, and some of us, if we’re really honest, don’t want the same spouse or house or job or lifestyle. But, being authentic seems impossible because it would mean hurting others and tearing apart all you have built together. Stella is different, not by choice, but wasn’t she desperate for a change? Stella deserved better, and in an unconventional manner, the universe set her free from the patterns and mindset that tethered her to an unfulfilling life for so long. Simon is far behind her, but he has been for a while. I wish maturity for him, but it’s too late for that. He is set free as well. Libby is a thorn, and I didn’t care for her. She felt like a violation of some kind, like a piece that did not fit. This story is really beautiful but almost incomprehensible because of the truths no one wants to admit about dreams long gone and dreams held new and now. Do the recesses of the mind, the deeply buried doubts and hope, manifest in reality?I love this book, despite the heartache I felt at times, because it reminds me to remember who I was, who I am and where I’m going. Take some time out to read this gem.
Forty-nine years into my relationship with my husband, I can attest that people change and grow and couples must learn to adapt to the changes.
Typically, personal growth evolves over time. But imagine waking up to find your partner in a coma, and they recover they a totally different person. Imagine that your connection is broken, your shared loves lost, that you are strangers that quickly.
With or Without You by Caroline Leavitt is the story of Simon, a one-hit-wonder still lusting after fame, and Stella, a practical nurse. They have been in love for decades even though their dreams don’t mesh. Early in their relationship Stella gave up following Simon on tour and took up a career. Now in her early forties, she wants permanence and a family.
A new star in music recognizes Simon’s band as his inspiration they are invited to open for him in Las Vegas. On the eve of Simon’s leaving to reboot his career, Stella isn’t sure she wants to give up her life to go on the road again.
Bad decisions leave Stella in a coma. Simon stays at her side while the band replaces him and moves on. Stella’s work friend and doctor, Libby, had never liked Simon before, but in their mutual care for Stella, they become friends.
Stella comes out of the coma and recuperates. Foods she loved she now hates. She volunteers at the hospital and no longer enjoys being there. What does engross and calm her is drawing, demonstrating an amazing talent. For her drawings do not only show the outside of a person, they capture their inner being.
Simon, Stella, and Libby work out their ever more complex relationships, all on a journey into healing, personal growth, and an opportunity for full and productive lives.
Each character’s childhood has impacted their self-image, and once confronted, they are able to become happy and healthy. This aspect of the story has universal appeal, affirming the possibility for wholeness and self-realization.
I loved the exploration of the quest for artistic success and the lure of fame against the pure love of doing art leading to success.
A thoughtful, deep novel with fully formed characters and a happy ending which I read in 24 hours.
I was given a free ebook by the publisher through NetGalley in exchange for a fair and unbiased review.
With or Without You is an intimate and honest story of Stella, Simon, and Libby. Stella and Simon’s relationship seems to be unraveling when tragedy strikes and Stella is hospitalized. Simon is forced to finally grow up and choose Stella over his aspirations. Author Caroline Leavitt has created flawed characters with a lot of baggage who readers are sure to love and hate simultaneously. None of the characters are wholly likable, but their story is interesting.
The story is told in alternating POV so that readers are immersed in the main characters’ feelings. This really showcases how much the characters are changing along with their uprooted plans. I liked the addition of flashbacks to tell the characters’ backstory.
Stella’s return forces the couple to take stock of their relationship. I liked that the ending was inconclusive because life isn’t usually prettily wrapped up with a bow after a few chapters. The ending left me with hope.
This was a very emotional book for me as it asks the question of what do we owe others and how much of ourselves do we give up in the process of becoming an adult. This book will keep you turning the pages as the characters maneuver through life challenges of their own.
“Nothing and no one stays still or stays the same. Everything and everyone changes. We all have multitudes inside of us, each of them young with hope.”
With or Without You is a compelling, messy, and raw look at relationships and the circumstances that bring us together or tear us apart. I was completely involved in the lives of the characters of this book, as they change and grow and hurt….dealing with both things that they can’t control, as well as those they can. There is regret, betrayal, hope, resilience, forgiveness, and a lifetime of possibilities.
This wonderful book captured the realistic, always changing dynamic of a long committed relationship and took a hard look at the things that motivate us to change as we age. At times it tore my heart in two, then had me nodding at the honesty exposed in those painful moments. It’s not a light read but I was left satisfied, like these characters went through enormous growing pains while in my hands and can now continue on without me. I didn’t see this particular ending but it had a beautiful realism that you’d see in French cinema. Caroline Leavitt has a succinct voice that never lingers too long, which keeps the pages turning.
This is a quick read, perfect for poolside or in that hammock, but it has the emotional depth expected from literary fiction that examines the importance of family, friendships, useful communication, self-worth, and self-growth. It also poses questions on the importance of love, respect, second chances, forgiveness, and hope. I highly recommend this thought-provoking story.