From the author of the beloved New York Times bestselling book Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? and the creator and star of The Mindy Project comes a collection of essays that are as hilarious and insightful as they are deeply personal.
In Why Not Me?, Kaling shares her ongoing journey to find contentment and excitement in her adult life, whether it’s falling in love at work, seeking new … whether it’s falling in love at work, seeking new friendships in lonely places, attempting to be the first person in history to lose weight without any behavior modification whatsoever, or most important, believing that you have a place in Hollywood when you’re constantly reminded that no one looks like you.
In “How to Look Spectacular: A Starlet’s Confessions,” Kaling gives her tongue-in-cheek secrets for surefire on-camera beauty, (“Your natural hair color may be appropriate for your skin tone, but this isn’t the land of appropriate–this is Hollywood, baby. Out here, a dark-skinned woman’s traditional hair color is honey blonde.”) “Player” tells the story of Kaling being seduced and dumped by a female friend in L.A. (“I had been replaced by a younger model. And now they had matching bangs.”) In “Unlikely Leading Lady,” she muses on America’s fixation with the weight of actresses, (“Most women we see onscreen are either so thin that they’re walking clavicles or so huge that their only scenes involve them breaking furniture.”) And in “Soup Snakes,” Kaling spills some secrets on her relationship with her ex-boyfriend and close friend, B.J. Novak (“I will freely admit: my relationship with B.J. Novak is weird as hell.”)
Mindy turns the anxieties, the glamour, and the celebrations of her second coming-of-age into a laugh-out-loud funny collection of essays that anyone who’s ever been at a turning point in their life or career can relate to. And those who’ve never been at a turning point can skip to the parts where she talks about meeting Bradley Cooper.
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I came here to remind everyone that Mindy is a genius, and share this lovely quote from Why Not Me?:
“It’s traumatizing to think that a best friend could become just a friend. That’s because there is virtually no difference between an acquaintance and a friend. But the gulf between a friend and a best friend is enormous and profound. And if I look at it that way, I think I can see the value of a wedding. If you’re my best friend and the only way I get to have dinner with you is by traveling thousands of miles, selecting a chicken or fish option, and wearing a dress in the same shade of lavender as six other girls, I will do that.”
I love Mindy Kaling. I love her sense of humor and I love that she’s so relatable. This collection of essays can be a bit all over the place but that’s what makes it great. One second she’s telling us why sex scenes are awesome and everyone in Hollywood is lying about hating them and in the next we’re hearing a Harvard Law Speech of her advice. I could quote this book back at you for days but really, just read it, it’s so much better coming from her.
This book is a collection of Mindy’s essays. If you come into the book remembering that, it is an excellent read. This isn’t her life story, but does include parts of her life. I love the ability some people have to just make people laugh, Mindy Kaling is one of those people. Parts of this book made me laugh out loud. She is so relate-able and I love it when a “star” is like that.
Last year I read one of my daughter’s books: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling. Of course, I found it terribly amusing and giggled my way through the writer’s clever observations and adoring self-awareness. (I still laugh when I think of certain excerpts, like how she boasts of her birth weight if the topic of weight enters the conversation. Only six pounds when I was born!)
When my coworker brought me her second book, “Why Not Me?”, I was eager to jump in her second query-titled book. I had just read two dramatic thrillers and was ready to laugh. And laugh I did.
Mindy, once again, entertains with her pithy observations that range from the privileges of Hollywood starlets, friendship crushes, and the fuss about weight. Mindy’s authenticity enchants. She’s acutely aware of superficiality, but doesn’t remove herself from its trappings. To look gorgeous in pictures, never sit up straight. Do not allow your arms to lie flat against your body–a tip from Kim Kardashian. I must admit…brilliant. Sure, shallow. But brilliant.
Don’t think there isn’t sustenance in this book. One of my favorite anecdotes is when Mindy is overlooked as an Emmy nominee, and must announce the nominations anyway. She candidly confesses her inner turmoil. As she articulated her anger, I had visions of Kelly Kapoor coming unglued. (I almost couldn’t wait!) But Mindy was better than that. She didn’t want to act civil, but she understood the power of acting gracious.
The joy of reading comedy is how it can take you by surprise. In the middle of the book, we find a compelling love story. After I read the chapter, I realized how Mindy was showing off her writing chops. Suspense. Longing. Dynamic characters like the Obamas. Disillusionment. Unrequited love. Of course, I recognized this pattern from her TV resume. Nonetheless, the story had me captivated. I was only disappointed not to see a photo of “Will.” There were so many other great photos! Why not Will? Does it have anything to do with BJ Novak? And her confusing relationship with him? Maybe! (I can’t wait to read Mindy’s post wedding book.)
There were lots more hilarious and truly interesting parts. Her opinion of sex scenes. Her mother’s influence. The diagram of her brain and the amount of it devoted to her phone charger. But I have to admit, my favorite part of the book is the ending. Not because I wanted it to end. It’s because I found her thoughts profound.
Mindy Kaling addresses confidence after brushing through a young teenage girl’s inquiry on the topic. She then philosophizes on her response and comes up with an important insight. Her confidence has been born from her sense of entitlement. Now, before you raise your eyebrow, keep reading. Entitlement has a bad rap right now –mostly because so many people feel entitled because they see other people have what they want. But Kaling makes a salient point: there’s nothing wrong with feeling entitled as long as you deserve it. Mindy has worked extremely hard to achieve the success she’s obtained. She tells a story about receiving a fIuff award for cutest clothes at a youth basketball camp. Her mother hid it, explaining that it wasn’t a deserving award. It was a participation award. The formula is so simple, yet so great: Work hard. Achieve success. Confidence will certainly appear. I had my 14-year-old son read this section, because the advice is some of the best you can give your kid. Mindy probably didn’t realize it, but the book is really a parenting manual.
I hesitated to write everything I just did, because I didn’t want to spoil the book for you. But believe me, there’s much more fodder to enjoy. You will undoubtedly fall in love with Mind. One chapter starts off with a Holden Caulfield quote from The Catcher in the Rye:
“What really knocks me out is a book that, when you’re all done reading it, you with the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him on the phone whenever you felt like it.”
Talk about foreboding. Maybe I’ll tweet her @mindykaling. I could use more parenting advice.
Mindy is so much fun, I loved hearing about her growing up and trying to fit in. She gives great advice on how to be confident with yourself, even if you are the minority in the room. She reads her book with enthusiasm and humor. If you want a great memoir to listen to while you work or just because, I definitely recommend this one.
I have enjoyed both of the Mindy Kaling books I’ve read so far, but it feels so weird to say “I’ve read,” because I didn’t. I listened to them on audiobook. She cracks me up and is her own little person, although she says she’s actually a larger person. I still see her in my brain as a cute little person, so I guess I don’t mean little as in size, I mean little as in like a grownup who still feels like a kid or thinks straight-up like a kid kind of thing. Maybe it’s because she is still brave enough to ask questions and say what she thinks and have conversations that the rest of the world thinks are inappropriate or rude or, I don’t know, something. That the world has labeled but that are just part of life, and so she’s not afraid because hello, we’re alive, and these are our lives. It’s funny because I would warn my family that I was listening to this “inappropriate book” and what I meant was the language, because some of those words aren’t ones we use, right, because they’re inappropriate. See what I mean? I think my favorite part was when she met the president and also the Will story, or chapter, or whatever, and then later her speech at the college. I am a better reader than I am a listener, so I know I could’ve done a better job “getting” all of the story, so I am sorry about that, Mindy, but I did like your book. I laughed, or I could relate, or I could at least picture things from your descriptions. The emails were hilarious and I never knew “re” was “regarding.” Ha. I thought it was reply. I’ve still never seen Mindy or her show, and her world is one I’m so out of reach and out of touch with, but still this was an enjoyable book. So I imagine those that know who you are and have seen your show and know some of the stuff of you world can really rate this one up there high and enjoy it and understand it even more. If you write another one (or maybe you did) I will read it or listen to it, whatever I can manage. Oh, and I still like the lists. I liked all the lists except for the lists of things you worry about in the night. I didn’t feel happy realizing all those worries. Sad. But I don’t think you dwell, so that’s good! Good for you. I think it makes me want to write a book so you can learn about MY world and my people and stuff. I think you would crack up and enjoy some of our stories and getting to know US.
I listened to the audible version of thia book. It was funny and interesting. I would recommend it.