In Until I Find You, celebrated author Rea Frey brings you her most explosive, emotional, taut domestic drama yet about the powerful bond between mothers and children…and how far one woman will go to bring her son home. “Frey is a rising star in the suspense scene” – Booklist 2 floors. 55 steps to go up. 40 more to the crib. Since Rebecca Gray was diagnosed with a degenerative eye disease, … Rebecca Gray was diagnosed with a degenerative eye disease, everything in her life consists of numbers. Each day her world grows a little darker and each step becomes a little more dangerous.
Following days of feeling like someone’s watching her, Rebecca awakes at home to the cries of her son in his nursery. When it’s clear he’s not going to settle, Rebecca goes to check on him.
She reaches in. Picks him up.
But he’s not her son.
And no one believes her.
One woman’s desperate search for her son . . .
In a world where seeing is believing, Rebecca must rely on her own conviction and a mother’s instinct to uncover the truth about what happened to her baby and bring him home for good.
“Completely captivating, utterly compelling…a must read!” – Liz Fenton & Lisa Steinke, authors of The Two Lila Bennetts
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This is the second of three books by this author that I have read and loved. It’s a very touching, loving, story of many losses and a love so deep nothing can stop it. Nothing can take it away. Nothing can stop the feelings of a mother who is looking for her child who has been taken. This is my favorite Rea Frey book.
Rebecca/Bec is a new mother. She’s also blind. She has had a year that is more than most could ever endure. She lost her husband, her mother, her sight and now her three month old baby boy. Who could do such a horrible thing. Bec always meets her friends at the park. Each has a child and each knows the love of a mother. It runs deep. Did one of them take her baby and leave a total stranger in his place. Do any of them believe her about her son being taken?
Rebecca goes through something that is so horrible. So unforgivable. So heartbreaking. She feels so alone. No one seems to believe her when she says that the baby in her home is not her son. But she knows. She knows her son. She may be blind, but she knows. On one can convince her that this baby is hers. But she’s not heartless. She worries about this little boy too. Why is he in her son’s crib. Who would do such a horrible thing to her.
When it seems all else has failed Rebecca does what she has to do to find her baby boy. She won’t stop until she has Jackson back where he belongs. Her friends help her as much as they can and a long ago love reappears. Jake was the love of Rebecca’s life until his job took him away. She had her reasons for staying behind. She had a promising career as a Cello player.
Crystal is Rebecca’s best friend. They met at grief counseling and immediately hit it off. They became fast friends. Both lost their husbands and both have a child. Crystal has a 10 year old daughter she’s raising on her own. She has a nanny to help but she misses her husband so much that she’s not totally there for her daughter. As much as Crystal wants to help Rebecca, she is not sure whether the baby is truly not Jackson or not. She’s never really looked at him. Never held him. She just doesn’t know. But she does know that Bec is a wonderful mother and that something is definitely wrong.
This story is told from two views. Rebecca’s and Crystal’s. Each has a story to tell too. Each has many things going on in their lives. Each has lost to much. They have friends that are there but do they really know them. Do they really know each other? There are many twists going on in this book. Two stories actually told. There’s Rebecca’s story and Crystal’s story. Of each of their lives and losses. Things going on that only they can understand. They have a close friendship. Rebecca is giving Crystal’s daughter Cello lessons too. Crystal’s daughter needs attention. Attention from her mother not the nanny.
This book is so good. It’s a heartfelt story of a mother’s love for her baby boy. What she is willing to do to get him back. The forgiveness she has in her heart for others. The kindness she has. It’s the story of several mothers. All with problems of their own. One knows what happened. I didn’t figure it out. Can you?
Thank you to #NetGalley, #ReaFrey, #StMartin’sPress for the ARC of this book. This is my own true review.
I gave it a 5/5 stars and the highest recommendation. A must read.
How can she cope with so many losses in her life?
Rebecca lost her sight, her husband, her mother, and now the nightmare of losing her son seems to have come true.
When Rebecca absolutely knows this is not her baby, she goes to all lengths to find him even though no one believes her because they see no difference between this baby and Jackson.
Rebecca’s friends do help her, but they can’t be there 24/7 if she needs help.
Besides all these things happening and her friends seeming to help, they appear to be a bit shady along with the babysitter of one of the friends.
I actually didn’t like or trust any of Rebecca’s friends. They just seemed to not be sincere, and they all seemed to have problems of some sort and secrets.
I felt something sinister as I read, and as odd things happened, and as authorities reacted, the tension increased and I believed her that this baby was not her son.
UNTIL I FIND YOU has a tension-filled build up, and you can feel the dread and fear Rebecca has.
The ending is a big surprise.
Those readers who enjoy thrillers and solving mysteries, will not be disappointed. 5/5
This book was given to me by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
There is no such thing as paranoia. Your worst fears can come true at any moment. – Hunter S. Thompson
This was a book that caused me a few very tense moments. Going blind is a big fear of mine. This author ramped up my anxieties from page one, just about the loss of vision. She did a masterful job of describing the main character’s gradual loss of vision and the feelings of what incurs when that happens.
Rebecca Gray used to be a cellist with the Chicago Symphony Orchestra, traveling the world, and playing her music. But, as she gradually lost her sight, she wasn’t able to continue in her beloved profession.
On top of the tremendous losses of losing her vision and profession, she has also had two more life-changing tragedies recently in her life. It’s no wonder she’s having panic attacks.
She now lives in a suburb outside of Chicago with her baby son and tries her best to navigate in a world she can no longer see. She is severely sleep deprived, as most new mothers are, and so when strange events start happening to her, she’s not sure whether it’s her imagination or not.
Then one day the unimaginable happens. She goes in to pick up her son and he’s been switched with another baby. And no one will believe her.
This was an excellent book even though it almost gave ME panic attacks. It was a psychological thriller filled with some twists and turns throughout its pages and I highly recommend this reading experience. I rated it 4 1/2 stars rounded up to five.
I received this book from St. Martin’s Press through Net Galley in the hopes that I would read it and leave an unbiased review.
I cannot imagine being a new mom, new widow and blind. The only way it can get worse is if you think someone swapped out your baby for another and no one believes you. Everyone thinks you are losing it.
This is the basic plot line for this story. I could feel the frustration of Rebecca, the main character.
Definitely plot driven. Lots of foreshadowing if you can pick up on it. But, the ending is still a surprise.
Entertaining and fast paced!
This is an emotion-packed domestic drama with some definite aspects of a thriller. Rebecca (Bec) Gray has had some real challenges thrown at her. First, her husband died, so she is a widow. Then, she has a new infant to take care of. Her mother recently died and she has moved into the suburbs of Chicago to live in her mother’s former home. Finally, and not the least of her problems, Bec has a degenerative eye disease that is making her go blind. Bec is a talented musician and seems to be adjusting well to all of these changes in her life, having students come in for private lessons and making friends at a grief group. One of the friends she makes is Chrystal who is also a widow and has a young daughter named Savi and a nanny named Pam. The author did a wonderful job of setting the stage for me to be surprised when the conflict starts, which is when Bec discovers that her baby has been switched. Is Bec delusional or is Jackson really missing? Bec is faced with the difficult task of convincing the seeing world that her son has been taken. What a twisted and heart-wrenching story! I thought that Bec had enough problems already when Jackson suddenly disappeared, or did he? That was the question throughout the rest of the book and the author did a superb job of keeping my attention as I read to discover what was really going on in the tragic life of the main character. Fans of domestic drama and thrillers will enjoy this book, with tears, I think.
Disclaimer
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher via Netgalley. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255, “Guides Concerning the Use of Testimonials and Endorsements in Advertising.”
Rebecca (Bec) Gray is blind and mother to an infant son, Jackson. She is learning to maneuver around to enable her to take Jackson for strolls around the park. She worries about when he gets older and more mobile if she will be able to keep up with him and protect him. Her husband, Chris, died about a year ago when he was hit by a car. She then moved in with her mother who has since died.
Bec has made many friends in this nice neighborhood and belongs to a grief group. One friend she has made there is Crystal whose husband, Paul, was killed by a drunk driver. She has a daughter, Savi, age 10. Bec was once an accomplished cellist. Savi has expressed an interest in playing the instrument and Bec is giving her lessons.
At the park one day, Bec faints but quickly rallies. She is somewhat sleep deprived. So a friend takes her home and insists that she nap while her friend watches Jackson. When she wakes up to attend to her baby, she realizes just by touch that this child is not Jackson. Who took her son and why?
This is a book full of angst and sadness. I couldn’t imagine being blind! The author certainly did a good job of describing Bec’s challenges. What I didn’t like was that Bec tends to be a hot head and jumping up and leaving the house when the notion strikes her. Sometimes she leaving her phone behind and sometimes it’s late at night. Not good. Of course her grief is enormous as is caring for a newborn so perhaps the author was striving to place these actions as a reason for her impulsiveness. An interesting story that I enjoyed.
Copy provided by NetGalley and in exchange for a fair and honest review.
Rea Frey, the author of “Until I Find You, has written a unique, intriguing, intense, captivation, and emotional thriller. The genres for this novel are Psychological Thriller, Domestic Thriller, Fiction, and Women’s Fiction. The story takes place in the present and goes to the past when it pertains to the characters or events. The author describes her characters as complex, and dysfunctional. Some characters are suspect and strange. There are betrayals and danger in this story.
Rebecca Gray is widowed with a young baby and has a degenerative eye disease that is making her blind. Rebecca is trying to be independent and bring up her baby the best way that she can. She counts steps and using a special walking stick to get out and do what she has to do. Rebecca does meet her friends in a local park. She also belongs to a support group for other widowed mothers and meets a friend with a 10-year-old girl.
With her disability, Rebecca has to proceed with caution, and there are a few times, a door that she locked is left open, and things aren’t in the correct place. Rebecca has to call the police before entering the premises. She is having feelings that she is watched.
Rebecca’s baby is a very good-natured baby, and like any mother, Rebecca knows her son. Somehow Rebecca becomes convinced that her baby is missing and has been “switched”. She has an irritable baby, and her friends confirm that it is her baby. Doesn’t a mother know her own child? What if the mother is blind? Rebecca’s friends and even the police are starting to question Rebecca’s claims. Will Rebecca lose everything?
This is a thriller that will leave you on the edge. It is a page-turner with twists and turns that I would highly recommend.
It has been a while since I read a novel about a baby switch so was very hopeful that it would something to sink my teeth into. I love a good who done it. This one was a little different in that the mother was blind so added some new ways for her to be ignored and poo-poo’d by everyone around her and to think she was crazy. I found her to be a strong, amazingly bright and yet stubborn woman. I understood her wanting to prove to herself and the world that no matter what happened she could take care of herself and her child. It was interesting and had some wonderfully well crafted twists and turns. That said, for me it had some glaring issues that I kept getting stuck on. Why didn’t anyone who is sighted notice that it was a different child or just look at some pics of the baby before and after? How would no one else notice that it was a different baby? In fact they do not all look the same. What kind of friends does she have that they thought she was crazy rather than believing a mothers instinct? Also, every childs footprints are taken at birth so why not check that, run a simple blood test or even DNA test? The ending for me was wrapped up in an unbelievably silly manner and under no circumstances would any mother just walk away like she did. Not after what she had been through. So if you can suspend anything related to reality and our legal system than you might enjoy this book. I found the ending disappointing. She was so much nicer and more forgiving that I or anyone I know could or would have ever be.
Rea Frey never fails to delight me. I loved “Not Her Daughter” and “Because
You’re Mine”. “Until I Find You” is another hit.
The smooth, captivating writing immediately drew me into the story. I loved the characters. The story alternates between Bec, a grieving blind widow who has recently lost her mother, and Crystal, also a grieving widow with a ten-year-old daughter. Both are completely believable. Bec and Crystal became friends at their grief support group. When Bec’s three-month-old son is the center of a baby swap, Bec is devastated. The emotions are raw – grief, fear, anger, frustration, terror. It gets even worse when the police do not believe her son is missing.
I loved the plot and the pacing of the story. I was kept guessing as to who was behind the swap and where Bec’s baby is. But there was one major mystery in the story that was never explained. That accounts for my four-stars rating instead of five stars, But I still loved this heart-wrenching story.
Until I Find You is an emotional, poignant novel written in the points of view of Rebecca, a nearly-blind woman, a recent widow, and a new mother, and that of Crystal, a friend of Rebecca’s who lives nearby. Crystal is also a recent widow but is dealing with a child prodigy of a ten-year-old daughter.
Rebecca is exhausted from trying to survive without her considerate husband who helped her navigate her world as she loses more and more of her vision. Raising a baby while seeing is difficult, but while blind infinitely more so. She’s felt for several weeks that she’s being followed, that things in her house are being rearranged, that doors she knows she locked are unlocked, but she—and everyone else in her life—attribute her paranoia to fatigue. But one day, she faints in the park. Friends take her home and watch her baby while Bec gets some rest. When she awakens, she knows the baby in her arms isn’t her son. The police seem more interested in maintaining the pretense that their community is free of crime instead of helping Bec.
In Until I Find You, Frey pulls the reader through every emotion Bec has: her confusion, paranoia, grief, love for her child, and the horror she experiences when she realizes the baby she’s holding isn’t hers. She suspects everyone, and the plot twists keep the reader guessing until the end.
Rebecca Gray has a daegenerative eye disease and is legally blind. The loss of her eyesight is just one of several losses she has endured in the last year. Her husband died in an automobile accident and shortly after her son Jackson was born, her mother passed away. Bec had moved in with her mother after her husband’s death so she could have her help during her pregnancy and the birth of her baby. Lately she was feeling like someone was following her and things had been moved in her house. Then, after she fainted in the park and was returned home with help from her friends, she woke to find that the baby in her crib was not her son Jackson but a strange baby. No one believed that her baby had been switched, except an ex-lover and homicide detective and he had doubts. There are many twists and turns in this story and the reader gets a real idea of the difficulties a blind person lives with daily and the determination that Bec had to get her son back.
I won’t recap the book as the publisher’s blurb does a fine job of it without spoilers that might lessen your enjoyment.
Until I Find You is a compelling read that will wrench your heart again and again. I am rating it 3 stars because overall the story seems uneven to me. The main character, Bec, is quite well drawn and it is easy to feel empathy for her. Most of the other characters are not as fleshed out and sometimes seem stereotypical. I also had a hard time believing the premise of the book. The ending is quite a surprise however. Mixed feelings about this read. Looking at the other reviews for this book, I realize that I am in the minority, so please read several of the reviews and decide for yourself whether this would make a good read for you.
My thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for allowing me to read an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest, unbiased review. All opinions expressed here are my own.
Bec is a very strong character. I think the author did a great job of making the reader understand the complications of being a parent while being blind. This added another layer of suspense to the whole story. I suspected several characters incorrectly before the conclusion of the story. I thought the book was well written and and well paced. The book had a satisfying conclusion. The characters seemed real, like people we all know. I received an advance copy from NetGalley and am voluntarily leaving a review.
Rea Frey is a new author to me and I was very excited to read Until I Find You because the premise of the story very much intrigued me. Rebecca is a young widow with a three month old son. She’s navigating life on her own now, having lost her husband just about a year ago, and recently losing her mother as well. On top of these tragedies, she’s slowly been losing her sight to a degenerative eye disease. Now living in her mother’s house, she’s made a few friends with the other mothers in the neighborhood, and also with Crystal, another mother she met in a grief group. She’s managing okay for the most part, until the unthinkable happens one day and she becomes convinced that someone swapped her infant son with another baby.
As I said, the premise of this story really intrigued me, particularly with Rebecca being almost completely blind, and having to convince everyone around her that this baby she found in the crib is not her baby. Obviously that would be so much easier to accomplish if she could see because then she would be able to actually see him. But she’s having to rely solely on touch and having a photographic memory, she can tell you exactly every inch of her son’s skin, from the eczema behind his ear to the small divot in his collarbone. I really applauded Rebecca for not completely falling apart when she realized her son had been taken. I don’t know that I would have been as steady and solid as she was.
Ms. Frey certainly takes the reader on a whirlwind ride with Rebecca, it being all the more tenuous with Rebecca’s vision impairment. I was impressed with how mobile she was, walking to the park everyday, going to appointments, navigating the world with basically no one’s help at all. Her friends were all there for her, but she had a tendency to push them away ALL THE TIME. I understand she felt the need to do things on her own, but she absolutely refused help at every turn. It became frustrating pretty quickly that she was SO stubborn and pushed people away so much.
I was really invested in the story. Ms. Frey really hooked me with how she laid out each chapter. One would be from Rebecca’s point of view and end with a sort of a cliffhanger and the next chapter would be from her friend Crystal’s point of view which I would want to hurry through to get back to Rebecca, BUT I figured out early in the story that Crystal was obviously a pretty critical facet of the story if she’s getting her own chapters. I’ll leave it at that.
I was impressed with how Ms. Frey interspersed the emotional and psychological aspects of the story throughout. Particularly the introduction of Rebecca’s ex-boyfriend Jake, who was the absolute love of her life until he moved away for work. And the subsequent love she shared with Chris, her husband, who was the one who was there for her while she was losing the rest of her sight. The internal struggles Rebecca wrestled with in regards to the guilt she felt over still having feelings for Jake and how she felt she was betraying Chris. I really enjoyed the depth of emotion in these scenes throughout.
As far as the main storyline of the swapping of her baby. That was very intriguing, but there were quite a few plot holes and unanswered questions by the end of the story. Maybe some of the questions I was left with were never supposed to be answered and possibly they were just supposed to be chalked up to an overly tired new mother who was still mourning the deaths of her husband and mother, I am not sure. I just know that by the end, I was left with a few unresolved issues that I found myself focusing on instead of the ending. And the Crystal storyline was executed in such a way that had me shaking my head throughout the story. I just don’t think that part of it all worked for me.
Overall, this story is a page turner, that is for sure!! I definitely plan to go back and look up Ms. Frey’s other books and read those as well.
Many thanks to St. Martin’s Press and Netgalley for providing me with an advanced review copy of this book in exchange for my honest and unbiased review.
This author does not disappoint, so when I found a new book by her, yes, I read it!
This time we are offered a woman that should, and is so broken, she has lost her husband, her mother, and now her eye sight. On top of this she thinks someone has taken her baby, and left a different one.
How would she know if she can’t see? As a mother you know their smell, and being blind leads to other senses taking over. How can she even go on?
How we get to know what happened to her little one is a journey, and you will be suspecting everyone, and no one went unnoticed in my mind, but when the answers came I was definitely surprised, I never saw it all coming.
From beginning to end you will wonder if Rebecca is mind playing tricks on her, how could something so horrible happen?
I received this book through Net Galley and the Publisher St. Martin’s Press, and was not required to give a positive review.
The premise of a baby being switched and a mother believing that this is not her child, is not a new one. In this novel, what makes it unique, is that the mother in question is blind.
Rebecca has certainly been through a lot. Her husband died before Jackson was born and she was relying heavily on support from her mother. A few months later, her mother passes away. So we have a mother who is losing her vision, is almost totally blind, and is trying to care for a newborn by herself.
Rebecca has been struggling but because she is living in her mother’s house, she knows her way around quite well. She has even been going to a mother’s support group in a nearby park. On one such meeting Bec has a fainting spell, falls and hits her head. She is hurt, bleeding, but refuses to go to the hospital. Her friend Crystal insists that she stay at her home for a few hours and get some sleep.
O.K., that is the primary set up. What happens after is the main storyline. When she goes to pick up Jackson from his crib, she knows it is not her baby. Of course any mother would know her own baby, even one who is blind. We know every inch of our baby’s body even though he may look similar to another baby. Each baby’s cry is unique, their smell, their feel!
From here we follow Bec’s efforts to get someone to believe her that her baby has been swapped for another. Even her friends doubt her because they aren’t quite sure that the baby isn’t Jackson.(Quite hard to believe that these friends can’t tell the difference in her baby??) She finally gets support from her ex boyfriend who is a homicide detective. I’m not going to go through the story because that would be a spoiler.
I didn’t feel the empathy, etc that I should have felt for Bec. Her constantly resisting help when she so obviously needed it didn’t make sense. I would think in real life there would have been social workers involved and help would have been recommended.
Her ex boyfriend suddenly is around to help her identify the baby who is not Jackson using the newest technology, he is a homicide detective. I think a simple blood test would have given her the proof that she needed.
The ending was too perfect and didn’t tie up a lot of loose threads that were introduced. Examples, her fainting spells, because there was more than one; the fact that she thought she was being followed; the over the top actions of a troubled child.
This novel is a quick read and I would almost categorize it more as chick-lit than mystery/thriller. There is a mystery but the main focus of the story is, can a blind mother care for her newborn alone with no help?
I received an ARC of this novel from the publisher through Edelweiss.
The novel is set to publish on
Until I Find You is a domestic thriller that will take your breath away, with a story that will get your heart racing even as your heart aches, with characters that are unforgettable, and a main character who is extraordinary. Rebecca is a widow, she is the mother of a baby boy, and she is blind. Her world is upended when, exhausted and overwhelmed, she reaches into her son’s crib when he is crying–and knows without a doubt that it is not her son. The best books are those that take you into the world of its characters, so that we feel we are living their lives right along with them; in this book, I felt like I was right next to Rebecca, not only feeling her anger, her despair, and her anguish, but also her blindness, as she traversed streets and buildings and staircases and hallways. Rebecca’s visual impairment gave an extra layer to this story, as everyone around her doubted her–and she had to be strong and brave and fight to get her son back.
UNTIL I FIND YOU by Rea Frey is a compelling and heart-wrenching story of loss, trust and the power of a mother’s love for her child. Recently widowed and now blind from a degenerative eye disease, Rebecca Gray returns to her familiar childhood home in the suburbs to raise her baby son, Jackson with the help of her mother. Not long thereafter, her mother also dies leaving Bec completely alone to care for Jackson. One day, while at the park with trusted friends, Bec faints. They get her to safety, but when she later awakens and goes to her crying baby, she is positive that the baby she comforts is not her Jackson. She tries to convince her friends and the police that this is not her child, but no one believes her. Determined to find out what happened to Jackson and bring him home, Bec must trust her instincts and go way outside her limited world despite the danger. This powerful story is full of raw emotion and twists and turns I never saw coming. The characters and their relationships were expertly portrayed. I could literally feel Bec’s panic and confusion as she tries to figure out what could have happened to her baby. The story kept me totally engaged right up until the shocking and unpredictable ending. I enjoyed this fast-paced and suspenseful domestic drama and highly recommend it. Thank you to the author, publisher and NetGalley for the chance to read an early copy.
First let me say don’t start this one late in the day/evening unless you plan to stay up to finish it; which I did! One chapter leads to an event that leads to an event to another emotion and you can’t stop. Rea Frey has become one of my favorite authors! I couldn’t stop guessing and turning pages fast enough. Thanks to Netgalley and St Martins Press for the ARC
Bec is mostly blind with a 3 month old son. Her husband died before Jackson was ever born. When she is at the park with her friends, she faints. When she wakes up, she knows the baby in Jackson’s stroller is not Jackson. The problem is no one believes her! Bec is on a mission to find Jackson and bring him back home! This was a good thriller but a few times I thought things that were happening were a bit far fetched. But all in all it was a book I enjoyed. I received an advanced readers copy and all opinions are my own.