Drowning In Total Darkness…..She Became My Light.Benson~I was a man who had it all. The perfect wife, terrific children, a beautiful home and my own business. Em and I were on top of the world. Until…we heard the word inoperable cancer. My entire world came crumbling down around me. I was losing my best friend, the love of my life. My new best friend became a bottle of bourbon. I am now a shell … am now a shell of a man drowning in my pain.
Marley~
Watching my best friend fade before my eyes is almost more than I can take. Em and I have been friends since nursing school. I never dreamed when I received that call that I would be here taking care of her, watching her vibrance wither away before my eyes. We had to say goodbye way too soon, but I made her a promise and I intend to keep it. I refuse to let him drown in his sorrows. I only wanted to pull him from the darkness, keep my promise, but life has other plans.
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A heart breaking and beautiful story of love after loss
I’m not one for sad books. Most of the time I avoid them but I’m so glad I took a chance on this story. Benson and Emily have the perfect life. A perfect house two beautiful sons and they love each other unconditionally. But when fate takes a turn and Emily is diagnosed with a brain tumor their life is thrown through a loop. Benson is falling apart, and the only one left to help him is his wife’s best friend. Marley is mourning the loss of her best friend, and trying to keep her promise to watch out for him. Soon she realizes that she wants more from him. Can they get over the guilt they feel? Highly recommend and a great story from a first time author. I look forward to what she comes up with next.
Oh wow for a first book it was amazing! I’ve cried more with this book than any I’ve read in a long time. Heartbreaking but inspirational at the same time. Wonderful characters and just an all round awesome book. Can’t wait for her next book.
For this story to be this authors first book, boy did she do good. This is a second chance Romance. You get all the feels in this one. To see two people come together and find that true deep down love. Super Amazing Story. I love Benson.
As a debut book for this author, I say she as a wonderful talent for writing. I loved following the characters of this story as they try to move on after the loss of a loved one. I look forward to more wonderful stories from this author.
This is a debut novel! Yes, take that in! This is the first ever book by this author! And it totally blew me away, reducing me to a tear stained, snotty mess by Chapter 23, although that wasn’t the first time I cried whilst reading this book, nor was it the last. However that was the point my partner looked at me with concern in his eyes, whilst I lay my kindle down to dry my face. I literally could not see the words in front of me.
What a heartbreakingly, beautiful read. This author reduces you to an emotional wreck and then slowly puts you back together. This truly touched me and I connected with the characters immediately. Honestly, you need to read this!
What a debut this is for Lynn Jaxon, she’s gone right in with all the hotness, then pulling your heart right out of your chest for a good old ugly cry.
But this is also a HEA.
A book of 2 stories, both fill with Love and so much sadness too all surrounding Benson.
Just when you think you have everything you’ve ever wanted and worked so hard for, to have your world ripped right out in front of you with very little warning, and not a thing you can do to stop it.
How do you mend when you have lost half of yourself.
This is a rollercoaster of a journey with a twist.
Just As I Am is the most emotional book I’ve read in a long time. I pretty much cried throughout the first half and then occasionally afterwards. I can’t imagine how anyone who has found the love of their life and/or has kids wouldn’t be a blubbering mess as they turn the pages and see grief from different perspectives.
This book shows two very different relationships for Benson. Because you immediately fell in love with his wife Emily. Marley is very different from Emily but equally loveable. And Benson never tried to turn his relationship with Marley into what he had with Emily. They both respected his past and developed their own relationship. Throughout the story, there are many little things happen that help the reader move on just as Benson does.
If you’re looking for an emotional read that will take you from the lowest of lows to the highest of highs, definitely pick this one up!
Just As I Am is a debut book for this author and it was amazing. You would think she has been writing for a long time as it was that well written and even though you are reading through cloudy eyes the pages just keep turning cause you want to know where your heart is going to go next. This book is about loss, love and healing. One thing to have handy reading this book is tissues and maybe a glass of wine or Starbucks if you love coffee.
Benson was a man who had it all. The love of his life, children, a successful business and so much more. In a blink of an eye it all changes with a word that many of us cringe at “Cancer”. No one is ever ready to hear this or have to deal with it. The life he lived and future that was planned is gone. He is losing his BF/wife (Emily) and becomes BF with a bottle.
Emily was his light and life. While it was sad, I loved how Emily’s actions were portrayed and how she continued to live on and how well she knew her family and BF, Marley. She was the Daisy in the bunch even from the younger years.
Marley and Emily were BF since college and she was like a second mom to the boys (Mitch and Henry). Never did she think she would be using her degree to help Emily enjoy her last days of life with her family. There was a reason Marley couldn’t trust after what happened and for good reason, but I think that while it was lonely for her she couldn’t find her one as it was meant for her to get a chance later in life. Marley held true to Emily and helped the boys and Benson. Benson was not always nice to Marley, but it was understandable as well.
It may have felt wrong to move on, but Emily knew that she wanted him to love again and when the time was right they would find something to know that it was okay to move and that it was in the making all along. I love the connection that Benson/Emily shared, the love the boys had and how they became and where they are going and I loved that Benson/Marley never replaced Emily as she lived on in their memories and then some. If you think you cried to much think again cause that ending has you in tears all over again!
While this story was heartbreaking, it was eye opening and healing as well. You are taken on an emotional roller coaster of laughter, tears, anger and happiness. This story will stay with you for a long time. I cannot wait to see more writing from this author and hope that Henry and Mitch get a story down the road. Grab tissues and pick up this amazing sad, but happy book! You will not be disappointed cause when you love, you love with flaws and all and take that person Just As I Am.
This is a really wonderful, emotion-filled story of love, loss and what happens when we stop letting grief take over and we take a chance on something new. A fantastic debut from Lynn Jaxon! Be prepared for this story to induce lots of tears and strong emotions, but don’t fret because there are also many light hearted and funny moments too. Jaxon does a good job of telling the story from each of the main characters points of view, starting with Benson and Emily. The start of this story is full of feels as we see the deep, passionate love between this couple. When Marley comes into the story it is easy to see the friendship and care that she has for Emily as well as her children, then later the care she shows to Benson.
Watching them all dealing with Emily’s loss was definitely emotional, especially with Benson. I just wanted to wrap him up in a fierce hug and shake him all at the same time; I think this is probably how Marley and his sons felt too. I thought Jaxon hit some great notes in making her description of Benson’s grief so realistic. Marley was so amazing in the tough love she showed Benson as he struggled, but it also fueled them building a relationship together. Marley is smart, strong and independent. I was surprised by her backstory, but I think it also gave her layers. We saw a bit of Benson’s alpha tendencies with Em, but they really come out with Marley. I kinda loved that!
All in all this was a fantastic debut story from this author! I will definitely read more from her, and would be happy if there were more from this world. So, I’m giving this one 4.25 Stars
I stumbled across Just As I Am by Lynn Jaxon and after reading the synopsis, I decided to give this author a chance even though I had hundreds of books waiting to be read.
Just As I Am tells the story of a family’s life as it is ripped apart by the ugly, devastating word nobody wants to hear, cancer. I immediately fell in love with Benson and his wife Emily and all too soon you are surrounded in grief and you experience their loss as a reader.
Lynn Jaxon tackles love, loss, heartache as this family falls apart and slowly rebuilds. She also adds another layer to the story with Em’s bestfriend Marley who is there to witness it all. I love how the story plays out and mends the broken hearts, including my own.
I know I’m in the minority here giving Just As I Am three stars, but please know from the start, I think that Lynn Jaxon has a lot of potential. This book was done pretty well- I liked Benson, and I truly felt the love he had for his wife, Emily. The beginning of this book was so heartfelt, and I cried (I love to cry, too, so this was a good thing). It was the second half of the book that I think went downhill for me a bit. Things between Benson and Marley just progressed too quickly for me- I didn’t feel as if Benson had enough time to really mourn Emily. And the kids seem to move on quickly, as well.
Again, I liked the book, and will definitely be on the lookout for more from Lynn Jaxon.