A Washington Post and Amazon Charts bestseller.Honesty is the best policy…except maybe when it comes to marriage in this brilliant novel about the high price of perfection from bestselling author Camille Pagán.Wife. Mother. Breadwinner. Penelope Ruiz-Kar is doing it all—and barely keeping it together. Meanwhile, her best friend, Jenny Sweet, appears to be sailing through life. As close as the two … sailing through life. As close as the two women are, Jenny’s passionate marriage, pristine house, and ultra-polite child stand in stark contrast to Penelope’s underemployed husband, Sanjay, their unruly brood, and the daily grind she calls a career.
Then a shocking tragedy reveals that Jenny’s life is far from perfect. Reeling, Penelope vows to stop keeping the peace and finally deal with the issues in her relationship. So she and Sanjay agree to a radical proposal: both will write a list of changes they want each other to make—then commit to complete and total honesty.
What seems like a smart idea quickly spirals out of control, revealing new rifts and even deeper secrets. As Penelope stares down the possible implosion of her marriage, she must ask herself: When it comes to love, is honesty really the best policy?
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Every aspect of Penelope’s life – her marriage, her household, her career, even her car – is running on fumes. Like Penelope, I found myself overwhelmed, frustrated, and angry at just about everyone, especially her self-centered, deadbeat husband, Sanjay. Grrr.
Then, here comes the inciting incident, rather, more accurately, the “insighting” incident. And all that’s been unseen – motives, emotions, secrets – slowly percolate to the surface, where they can be recognized for what they are and dealt with. I’m so glad Penelope and I both hung in there. The payoff was worth the pain.
I’m Fine and Neither Are You is a quick, humorous read. But it isn’t at all superficial. Ms. Pagán does a fabulous and beautifully subtle job of capturing just how much the people closest to us respond and react according to the (often unrealized) signals we give off. Ultimately, our lives emanate from us and no one else. Thank you, Camille Pagán, for reminding us of that important truth while giving us some laughs along the way.
I loved this book about women’s friendships and the need to pretend everything’s fine….Thanks for a wonderful read!
A good woman’s story, uplifting
I laughed, cried, and reflected my way through Camille Pagán’s glorious novel. It is honest, deep, and timely—not to mention exquisitely written. The story moves at a precise clip, gripping the reader and asking many of life’s toughest but most important questions. A perfect read!
I really enjoyed this. Some grown up themes I think many adults will be able to relate to. I can easily see this as a pick for Hello Sunshine. Definitely an addictive read with a strong female lead. It reminded me a lot of This Is How It Always Is (minus the LGBT theme) with the story being told from a mother’s perspective, having a husband who writes and works in the home, and together having to work through the presenting issues.
Worth checking out!
This is a story of what happens years after you find your true love. Now you have kids, a house, a job and too many compromises. Is it possible for both husband and wife to live happily ever after? I enjoyed this story about a wife and mother trying to figure it all out.
I’m Fine and Neither Are You was love at first read! I devoured this book in under 48 hours and am over the moon with Pagan’s writing and the relatable characters she’s created.
I couldn’t believe that the story was based in Ann Arbor and that Penny works for the University of Michigan – oddly enough I’m a fellow Michigander who also works at UM! Perhaps that was what initially hooked me, but ultimately Pagan’s ability to dive deep into the many layers of being a wife, mom, working professional and friend was what kept me turning each page as quickly as possible.
As a fellow female workaholic who’s about to embark on marriage and starting a family in the next few years, this book served as a fictional guide towards what to consider and ask myself as I go through these next steps in my life. I thank Pagan for painting a realistic picture of the many pressures women face and also being unafraid to display raw emotions from all character perspectives.
Nice journey
Great characters working through tough problems that we All encounter. Written in a straight forward and gentle manner. Loved it
Wonderful
“”Life,” he said, meeting my gaze. ” How ridiculously short it is, even if everything goes right.””
Life isn’t always easy and it’s definitely not always fair. It can change in an instant and leave you questioning where you are and the way you got there. This book is about Penny and her life that is suddenly changed in the loss of her best friend, Jenny. It’s a totally unexpected loss and the cause is so unbelievable to Penny that she questions how could her best friend have hidden so much from her and kept up the appearances she did. Penny saw Jenny living the perfect fairy tale life until the devastation reveals what Jenny was hiding.
Ms. Pagan takes on a very epidemic subject in our society today….opioid addiction. She does this in her story through a friend and family that struggles to find any kind of answers as to why and digging for something they might have missed that would have prevented such a tragedy. It also causes Penny to reevaluate her life and the unsatisfying routine her marriage and life have become. As I turned the pages hoping for Penny and Sanjay, her husband, to reconnect and rekindle their marriage, I felt the pain and struggles. There are lighthearted and witty passages that bring just enough to the story as to keep it from being too dark and hopeless.
So many people are affected by the results of opioid addiction. I could relate to this loss in a very personal way. The path an addict takes isn’t always obvious, as this book is evidence of. Ms. Pagan took those thoughts and feelings that a family and friends go through and wrote a book that touched me. The answers might not ever come out about why or what took a person to that point of becoming addicted…. Penny speaking, “….I racked my brain trying to remember what I had missed. It was a fool’s errand; you can’t hit a rewind button in your head and suddenly spot all the things you had overlooked in the first place.”
This book takes on the consequences of secrets and honesty. The scenarios that Penny finds herself in and whether to be totally honest or keep her inner thoughts to herself were real. I could relate to her dilemma. That’s a good question to think about. Being totally honest or keep things inside to protect yourself. Penny…”I had done the right thing by being honest and direct. And now I had to live with the consequences.”
I appreciate the message this book shares. It is painful when you’ve experienced it. I felt for Penny and Sanjay. I know things happen for a reason and the loss of Jenny also gave Penny and Sanjay a reality check. They had to come face to face with their relationship and make some changes.
I want to thank Ms. Pagan and Netgalley for the opportunity to read this book. It made my heart hurt but it also gave me pause to reflect on a person I loved dearly and know that his life was valuable and that he will always have a special place in my heart. I write this review in honor of Brian who loved life and gave it his all.
This is my honest and my own freely written review.
This book brutally honest, terribly sad, and hilariously funny — a perfect combination for an amazing read. It is the only book I’ve ever read that actually details that bathroom moment, on the toilet with no toilet paper and a toddler demanding attention… Also a realistic look at marriage. Loved the characters and the book.
This was a very thought provoking story. It was very well written and will make you feel like you are in Penny’s shoes at time. It’s a story that needed to be told and was done so in a way that makes you feel the pain of families and friends. The pain the character may have been in keeping such a secret from her best friend. Or maybe it was shame. Shame at feeling weak for someone who others thought was very strong.
Penny has been married to Sanjay for almost two decades. They have two beautiful children, a girl Stevie and a boy Miles. They are Penny’s life even though she thinks she may want to leave Sanjay. She confides almost everything to her best friend Jenny. They have been friends since Penny and Sanjay moved there. But to be so close Jenny kept a few secrets from Penny.
Sanjay was basically a stay at home dad for most of him and Penny’s marriage. For a long time I didn’t like him very much. I thought he was a bit cold and uncaring and a tad self centered and just not a good husband. He didn’t do much to make things easier on Penny, who worked a full time job with lots of overtime. She had lots of stress to deal with and he was not pulling his weight.
After a tragedy hits to close to home, Penny and Sanjay re-evaluate their marriage and decide to be completely honest with each other about what they want from each other. While I personally thing that married couples should always be completely honest with each other I admit that in lots of cases that may not be a reality. I could cause some unnecessary problems in a marriage if they have not been honest from the beginning. That is just my personal opinion though. I believe in honesty from my marriage.
This book touches on some subjects that are thought provoking and heartbreaking. One being opioid abuse. That hit me in a hard way. In 2010 I lost a brother who was 11 months older than me to opioid abuse. He went into a coma and never woke back up. It was very hard to deal with. So many questions arise from that and you can’t really get the answers you want. It’s horrible to deal with whether it’s a family member or friend. I’m glad someone wrote a story with this in it and it looks like Ms Pagan did lots of research before writing this wonderful book. It made me laugh in parts and weep in others. It was both sad and heartwarming. It’s a story of honesty, loss, love, marriage, children and lots of hard work to keep yourself going. I think it was an excellent book. Well written.
There were several sentences that I thought were worthy of posting here but have decided to not do that. I don’t really want to write the book again or give away anything. Just know it’s a great story and I recommend it highly to everyone that I know.
I gave it a 5 star rating for everything about it. It’s a great story. Thank you to Camille Pagan for writing this book from the bottom of my heart.
Thank you to NetGalley and Lake Union for the ARC in exchange for my complete and honest review.
I’m Fine and Neither Are You had me at times laughing and at times weeping. Camille gives us a thought provoking story on how well do we know our friends and family. We really don’t know what goes on behind close doors or in other peoples minds. We look at people and see exactly what they want us to see. We always say “everything is fine”. But is it really? How much of the truth do we want from our friends, spouses and family?
I can relate to Penny in this story. The characters are well developed and the book is a fast read. My favorite line is the book is “I had received her parting gift – the ability to look beyond what was missing and be grateful for all the remained”. I think a lot of us in life look and see what we don’t have instead of enjoying what we do have. This book is a must read. Thank you to Camille Pagan, the publisher and netgalley for an arc of this book and this is my honest review.
With amazing insight into what it’s like to balance marriage, home, and career, Camille Pagán has shined a spotlight on the stark truth, which is that it’s much harder than we make it look. Mother’s little helper takes on a very modern—and unsettling—meaning. This is one relatable tale.
A good novel that made me think and feel. I was put off at the book’s beginning by intimate (not sexual) happenings I would rather not have read. I’m glad I read on, as had I not, an excellent book would have been missed.
My thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
A tragedy causes Penny to reevaluate her life and search for what will make her happy again. I loved this book. It was so poignant, witty, and gives you a lesson in counting blessings and asking yourself what you need to be happy.
Camille Pagán covers an important difficult subject in a touching sensitive way. Mix that with excellent writhing, an amazing plot and characters you can identify with and you have a story that grabs you, touches your heart, teaches you and entertains you.
This one gets one of my rare 5 stars because is moved me in so many ways and will stay with me a long time. Absolutely worth picking up a copy
I sat down with this one and was really happy I had nowhere in particular to be, because once I started, I couldn’t put it down. Pagan has written a winner that mirrors the lives of so many women who are holding it together but are nowhere near “fine.” When Penelope realizes that her best friend’s life was just as messy as hers, everything she thought she knew was turned on its head. A wake up call, she starts to reevaluate everything in her life, wondering how she veered so far off track from her dreams. Taking and honest look at her life, she and her husband also start looking at their relationship.
I’m Fine and Neither Are You is the second novel I have read by Camille Paga̕̕n, and I love the way she writes with humor and emotion, touching on difficult subjects in a way that makes you both think and understand them more. This was a refreshingly honest look at one woman’s life that could easily be almost every woman I know, myself included. Written with wit and insight, this is a must-read for any woman struggling but putting on their “I’m fine” face. It also serves as a reminder that you never completely know what is going on in someone else’s life, no matter how close you are to that person.
#tallpoppywriters #bloomreads #Imfineandneitherareyou Camille Pagán #LakeUnionPublishing
I love how Pagan does such a wonderful job of writing about relatable female characters and their struggles. This book gave me much to think about because it is hard being a female and life just gets tough. Penelope has real-life problems and there are so many issues she faces, but that she also discovers her best friend, who seems to have it all, also faces. I love how bloggers who we see only the best of, are used in this book to let us know that no one is perfect or has a perfect life. This book has such a great story that flows beautifully and also makes you think that you’re not alone. I’m so grateful to have received an ARC of this fantastic new book from one of my favorite authors!
I. So glad I finally read this book, it was well written and told a great story with hints we can use in real life. There is so much more to say about it but I don’t want to give any spoilers so I will just say, have your Kleenex within reach. I loved it!!
The usual response when someone asks “How are you?” is “I’m fine. How are you?”. We’re all fine, aren’t we? But so many of those times, we really aren’t fine. And how much do we really know someone, when realistically, we aren’t completely honest with one another?
Penny thought she knew her best friend Jenny so well and was envious of her seemingly perfect life. But when that all comes crashing down, Penny takes a good look at her own life and decides some changes need to be made. But can she, her marriage, and her family survive those changes?
I loved I’m Fine and Neither Are You. I loved it because it was a story with relatable characters that drew me in and who I immediately cared about. I also loved it because it shows that no one is perfect, everyone has issues, and that we all need to remember we don’t really know what someone else is going through. And lastly, this story reminded me that we need to be honest and let others know what and how we are feeling. They won’t know if we don’t tell them, leading them to believe that everything is ‘fine’.
I’m Fine and Neither Are You is a wonderful look at all kinds of relationships and what it means to be honest in those relationships. You definitely should add it to your must-read book list.