The heart wants what it wants…My life is a carefully constructed lie. I’m in love with my best friend, but the way I feel could get us both killed. So as long as we stay here on the dusty ranch, I can never tell him how I feel. And if we leave, we’ll have nothing but the shirts on our backs.But when Josh is accused of a crime he didn’t commit, fate forces my hand. I steal him away, where it’s … hand. I steal him away, where it’s just the two of us against the world. I will do anything to keep him safe. I’ll steal. I’ll fight. I’ll tell lies.
Yet I can’t tell Josh how I feel.
I can’t tell him that this is all my fault.
And kissing him in the back of a stranger’s truck wasn’t exactly part of the plan…
Contains: first times, impossible choices, awkward confessions and love up against the kitchen counter.
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‘Goodbye Paradise’ by Sarina Bowen was first published in 2015 as ‘In Front of God and Everyone’. If you are a Sarina Bowen fan and never heard of this book, it is most probably because she published it under the penname Nealy Wagner. If you are subscribed to Sarina Bowen’s mailing list you probably know that ‘In Front of God and Everyone’ will be republished on March 21st, 2017 under a new name ‘Goodbye Paradise’ as a Sarina Bowen book.
Josh and Caleb, who are our heroes for the book, were born and raised in a polygamist compound called Paradise. There are rules they have to follow and they are isolated from outside world. There are no televisions, radio, phones, or even fast food. They only receive their basic needs, which consist of hand me down clothes and three meals a day, after working long hours in the farm. Boys, also known as Bachelors, lives in crowded bunkhouses and there are not allowed to interact with females. Because of Caleb’s family ranking in the compound, he was more respected, had a better job and was allowed to run errands outside the compound, which allowed him to interact with outside world more. As for Josh, he wasn’t as lucky as Caleb. He was treated badly and the only time he was out of the compound was when he was younger and went to public school for a while. Josh and Caleb are best friends since childhood but Josh starts to see Caleb as more than friends and his sexual fantasies towards his best friend are not acceptable in the compound. Because he doesn’t know anything other than what was thought in the compound, he feels guilty and sinful because of these fantasies. So when Josh gets kicked out of Paradise, he has no idea what to do, what is acceptable or not in the outside world but he is lucky because when Caleb realizes Josh will be kicked out from the compound, he decides to go with him. Without enough money and not knowing exactly what to do, they decide to find Maggie, who runaway from the compound couple years ago. On their way they meet with Washington, who is a truck driver and he helps them to reach their destination. During their trip to Maggie’s Josh and Caleb will slowly open up to each other regarding their feelings. With both being virgins, they start giving each other all their firsts. It was really sweet to see their relationship slowly evolve from friendship to partnership. Their struggles didn’t end when they reached to Maggie and her husband Dylan’s farm; it was just the beginning of a new life, which was totally foreign to them. If you are curious and want to know more about their struggles and relationship with each other or outside world, you should read the book
‘Goodbye Paradise’ is a sweet, sexy, heartwarming and hopeful story that you can easily read in one sitting. I couldn’t stop reading it until I was done with the book. Also, THANK YOU Sarina Bowen for deciding republishing the book because if she didn’t, I am not sure if I will ever get a chance to read this book.
The review was originally posted on: http://miabookaddict.com/
These boys stole my heart and melted it right into a puddle!!!
It’s only March 21st, not even a quarter of the way into 2017, and already I’ve read quite a few books that I know will be some of my favorite reads for the year when December rolls around, and Goodbye Paradise will be right there at the top of that list. It’s so beautiful and touching, it’s a little overwhelming for me to think about.
I’ve not read another book quite like this one. Joshua and Caleb have been brought up in what is basically a religious cult- with limited interaction with the outside world, the “Compound” is really all these boys know. This has not been an easy life for Josh: he’s not as tough or as strong as the other young men; his birth father died leaving him vulnerable to the whims of his stepfather and the other men in the compound. But what truly made living in Paradise unbearable for Josh are the feelings he has for his best friend Caleb- because those feelings are not something the people there would ever accept or understand.
He was the last one I saw before I closed my eyes at night and the first person I looked for when I opened them again in the morning.
Caleb has always been there for Josh, protecting him, helping him, defending him. He’s known it was just a matter of time before Josh was cast out by the elders, but unknown to Josh, he had a plan all set in motion for when this happened. Caleb is so strong and protective, the care he takes with Josh reduced me to tears on numerous occasions. (And it may be happening again right now) He’s the fixer, the care taker, the one you can always lean on.
“We’re going together. But if they toss you one morning and I don’t see it happen, I have to know where to find you.”
Once they’ve been set free of the confines of the Compound, not only do Josh and Caleb have to learn to navigate the real world, they’re finally free to express their feelings for each other, and that in and of itself can be quite a challenge for 2 people who have always had to hide their true selves. Their love story is a journey of highs and lows, but one that is so worth the ride.
”My whole life I’d wished for things. But I’d never known how confusing it might be to see my wishes come true.”
Goodbye Paradise is so unbelievably wonderful and lovely and just plain special. I don’t think my love for it can be adequately expressed in a few adjectives or sentences. This book is so much more than just two friends falling in love and finding their way in the world. It’s a true testament to the human spirit and how a little compassion can mean the world to someone.