FROM UP AND COMING GAY ROMANCE AUTHOR MATTHEW J METZGERHow can a man like him ever be enough?Jesse has never had a real boyfriend before. He’s a firefighter, and that’s all that anyone’s interested in—a quick and thrilling screw, and a story for the future. So when he lands Ezra Pryce, the most beautiful man in the whole of Brighton, Jesse can’t quite understand why Ezra is still here eight … Ezra is still here eight months down the line.
Not that he’s going to complain. Ezra’s sexy, sarcastic, and nothing shot of perfection—and Jesse can’t hope to measure up. He isn’t going to be enough for someone like Ezra in the long run, and he is living—and loving—on borrowed time. When a disastrous weekend in Norwich introduces Jesse to the staunch disapproval of Ezra’s family and the six-pack of his ex-boyfriend in one fell swoop, Jesse’s fate is sealed.
He cannot hope to live up to an ex who has every intention of getting Ezra back, and all the looks and charm to do it too. Jesse is not enough for Ezra and he’s never going to be.
Right?
more
Independent reviewer for Archaeolibrarian, I was gifted my copy of this book.
Jesse loves Ezra, he just can’t say the words while he’s waiting for Ezra to realise that Jesse isn’t good enough for him. It takes an accident to make him see what Ezra does: that Jesses really is more than enough for him!
For the most part, I did enjoy this. Besides one glaring reason, which I will tell you shortly, the other reason is a little less glaring and might just be the reason other people love this book.
And it’s Jesse himself!
You know the saying, if you hear it often enough, you’ll start to believe it?? Well Jesse does not believe Ezra when he tells him he loves him. Jesse does not believe Ezra when he tells him he does NOT want his ex. He does not believe Ezra when Ezra tells Jesse that his family are homophobic and will hate Jesse on sight but that’s only because Jesse is a MAN and not for Jesse himself.
And I found this bit hard to deal with! I mean Ezra tells him often enough, enough to get a little bored hearing Ezra repeat himself time and time again. Jesse talks himself down so much, I started to get negative feelings for him, and wanted to slap him upside the head and MAKE HIM SEE, but it’s not until he realises he might actually LOSE Ezra, that Jesse takes stock, and finally, halle-flipping-luiah, prasie the God he doesn’t belive in, Jesse FINALLY can see, that he really is what Ezra wants, WHO Ezra wants! It just took him far too long for my liking!
And the glaring thing?? Only Jesse has a say. Yes yes I know I say it often enough to be as annoying as Jesse is here, but come on! Ezra NEEDED a say, to balance out how negative Jesse was for most of this book. Ez is quite a chirpy soul, and I think this may well have been a 5 star read, had Ez been given a voice, and we got into HIS head, when he was telling Jesse over and over how much he loved him and wanted him.
It’s heavy on steam and passion, but at one point I thought it might come out almost clean. It wasn’t til it was clear it was NOT going to be clean, that I noticed it had been up to that point, and,to be honest, this book would have been great (previous points aside) had it been totally clean. I didn’t dislike that it came out not clean, but I would have liked it just as much if it had, does that make sense? Does to me, so hope it does to you!
The after effects of the accident is described in great detail, graphically so, and that really IS needed, to get the full picture. Not easy reading, but you do need it.
This is the first I’ve read of this author, but another of his books is sitting on my “languishing on kindle” shelf. I might pull it forward!
So, because Jesse was a little grating on the nerves, adn because ez doesn’t get a say. . . .
4 solid stars
**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
I would rate this 4.25 stars
Jesse is a firefighter with a huge lack of self-esteem. He seems to think the only thing he has to offer is sex. His first boyfriend is a teacher named Ezra. They’ve been together for 8 months and he is meeting Ezra’s conservative, Catholic family for the first time. Then, he meets Ezra’s ex-boyfriend and things start to go really wrong.
This book is more about Jesse’s journey battling his past demons and fears while learning to trust Ezra and himself. Erza has his own family issues. If Ezra’s mom is awful, Ezra’s sister is a true horror. At least Ezra’s mom has a moment in here where she redeems herself in the hospital. I don’t want to give you more of a spoiler than that, but while the book blurb tells you the whole plot, it also doesn’t give you the depth of what you are getting into here. The family issues are not magically solved with everyone an accepting happy clappy group at the end. I found this very realistic.
One issue that is used well at the beginning as a plot point is Ezra’s ex-boyfriend Liam. He is a foil and catalyst for some of their most conflicted moments as a couple. Yet, at the end, he is just dropped. I am of two minds about that. On the one hand, he is finally relegated to where he actually belongs in regards to his importance in their lives. On the other hand…did he just give up? If so, why did he give up? Did he finally back off because Ezra actually has a boyfriend, or was it something else? Did he no longer want Ezra? That would make him the biggest douchebag of all time under the circumstances, and contradicts how Ezra describes him.
Most of this is about those moments when dating turns into love and now the couple have to rip themselves open to each other to let that someone in. Seeing behind the curtain to see if they can be a real couple that shares the good and bad is part of the battle. Jesse learning his worth is a major part of the plot, but I was not totally happy with his epiphany moment. For me, there could have been some tweaking to let the reader know Jesse understood his value as a man: not just a firefighter or because Ezra loves him, and not just because he stayed. Still, the scenes between them are sexy and meaningful. There is never a doubt that Ezra is his whole world. It’s touching when he finally sees and believes that he is Ezra’s whole world too. There is a lot of time that passes in this novella so the reader gets to see when Jesse trusts himself to be himself, and trusts what Ezra tells him. I have to say I am starting to really like this author.
The cover art by Erin Dameron-Hill. I have to say I like the color choices. The hoodie is even reminiscent of fire gear and the blackened room shows Jesse’s nightmare landscape. I did picture him a bit bulkier due to the size difference with Ezra.