NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Raw, intimate, and timely—a no-holds-barred celebration of our bodies that flies in the face of antiquated ideas about sex and gender. “A triumph.”—Glennon Doyle • “One of the most important, life-changing books I’ve ever read.”—Rachel Held Evans, author of Searching for Sunday and Inspired Negative messages about sex come from all corners of society: from the …
Negative messages about sex come from all corners of society: from the church, from the media, from our own families. As a result, countless people have suffered pain, guilt, and judgment. In this instant bestseller, Nadia Bolz-Weber unleashes her critical eye and her vulnerable yet hopeful soul on the harmful conversations about sex that have fed our shame.
Bolz-Weber offers no simple amendments or polite compromises. Instead, this modern-day reverend calls for an inclusivity that empowers us to be loyal to people and, perhaps most important, ourselves. “Christianity is not a program for avoiding mistakes,” she writes. “It is a faith of the guilty.” With an alternative understanding of Scripture passages that have been weaponized against Christians for decades, Bolz-Weber reminds us that sexual flourishing can and should be for all genders, all bodies, and all humans. She shares stories, poetry, and Scripture that wage war on perpetual anxiety around sex by celebrating sexuality in all its forms and recognizing it for the gift that it is.
If you’ve been mistreated, confused, angered, and/or wounded by shaming sexual messages, this one is for you.
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A book filled with both pain and beauty that I think will be a healing balm to a lot of people. An enlightening, empathetic, and compassionate look at overcoming the shame the church has associated with sexuality and finding a new way forward. Highly recommended for anyone who’s struggling with their own sexuality in regards to church teachings or anyone who is looking for a new way to view sexuality through the lens of faith.
“If the teachings of the church are harming the bodies and spirits of people, we should rethink those teachings.” Amen!
Faith + Restoration + Sexual Reformation + and a whole lot of swearing!
Who This Book Is For:
If you’ve had someone tell you (pastor, counselor, parents, or otherwise) that God doesn’t love you because x, y, z, and it was harmful to you, if it affected you negatively in life, then this book is for you.
Your sexuality is a gift. If it has been shamed, or if that part of you feels stained for whatever reason, this may be worth checking out.
-An important section shared how women more often than men, are taught that sex before marriage is impure and unclean, and that perfect marriage would enfold to those who wait. Purity rings etc… This type of shame and control is addressed and I am passionately here for it! It’s time to address these fear tactics of control that do no good to the soul.
Special attention is given to the LGBTQ+ community. Real stories of how the church laws and parts of the Bible being enforced in church groups and at home were extremely harmful to these children growing up, and how that affected their adulthood, are shared with heartbreaking detail.
And lastly, if you are uncomfortable with the topic or act of sex (age-appropriate), or if you feel uncomfortable in your own nakedness, again this may be worth checking out.
Who This Book Is Not For:
If you are highly religious and follow the old rules to a T, this most definitely is not the book for you. If you cannot love thy neighbor, no matter sexual preference, this is not the book for you. If you pray for someone’s sexuality to be other than what it is, this is NOT the book for you. (Even though these types need to read this information the most.)
-If you are one of those judgy Christians, please realize how harmful you are being when you are not giving love and giving judgment instead. Judgment is a stain you place on someone else, they don’t know how it got there, and they can’t get it off. When the SNAKE shared HIS own judgments about the Tree of Knowledge with Adam and Eve, HIS judgments paired with their actions- “to gain approval” separated humanity from the Creator even more! Don’t be a SNAKE giving YOUR judgments, it will only separate people further, do you see? Approval isn’t needed, LOVE is.
The author is a tattooed, swearing, raw, and real human being who happens to be a straight, female, former pastor, previous stand up comic, and a recovering alcoholic. I loved her perspectives on many topics, as they are beliefs/issues I have with the church and Christianity myself, but not many around me, shared the same views:
•We are not judges, and should never act as so towards a group or even an individual.
•Everyone deserves to be loved, no matter sexual preference.
•Abstinence and Purity Culture are fear tactics, not helpful for everyone.
-In the majority of cases, when you tell someone not to do something and keep the knowledge hidden (talking about sex) they will go and learn and do the very thing. Sound familiar? It’s in our nature, just like Adam and Eve and the tree of knowledge they were to never eat from.
•Segregation is not the goal, the author is happy to preach so.
I loved this. Never do you hear preachers/pastors talk about the Trans community or otherwise in a positive way. Growing up in the Midwest I’d heard many fearful and negative things said and done that simply weren’t true. Fearing sex, hoping it doesn’t happen, and not teaching children about it, not preparing people for creation, to just leave young minds hanging like that, for them to figure it out on their own is completely (I’m with the author here) irresponsible. Should we be passing out condoms and birth control like candy? Maybe not, but we should not be shying away, fearing our sexuality. We should be SHAMELESS. I laughed when the author spoke about the porn pandemic and then said, look at all the NAKED Tribes still operating out there… we have done this to ourselves. We have created this cover-up and shameful culture around sexuality that is indeed backfiring. I’m so happy it’s being addressed.
This book is a message of the restorative love all those hurt, need. It’s time for a sexual reformation of being SHAMELESS!
PS- the (ARC) jacket cover of the Garden of Eden + Adam, Eve, and the Snake being the only three items in color along with the yellow title, is GORGEOUS!
Much gratitude to publisher Convergent Books for the hardback ARC I won in 2019 via the Goodreads Giveaway Program. I was under no obligation to write a review, my honest opinion is freely given.