No one likes to eat alone; to approach a table filled with people, only to be told that despite the open chairs there isn’t room for you. The rejection stings. It leaves a mark. Yet this is exactly what the church has been saying to far too many people for far too long: “You’re not welcome here. Find someplace else to sit.” How can we extend unconditional welcome and acceptance in a world … increasingly marked by bigotry, fear, and exclusion?
Pastor John Pavlovitz invites readers to join him on the journey to find–or build–a church that is big enough for everyone. He speaks clearly into the heart of the issues the Christian community has been earnestly wrestling with: LGBT inclusion, gender equality, racial tensions, and global concerns. A Bigger Table: Building Messy, Authentic, Hopeful Spiritual Community asks if organized Christianity can find a new way of faithfully continuing the work Jesus began two thousand years ago, where everyone gets a seat.
Pavlovitz shares moving personal stories and his careful observations as a pastor to set the table for a new, more loving conversation on these and other important matters of faith. He invites us to build the bigger table Jesus imagined, practicing radical hospitality, total authenticity, messy diversity, and agenda-free community.
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I was raised in a faith tradition where the table was (and still is) small. In fact, it’s the size of a TV tray. There’s no room for anyone who’s not their same color, sexual orientation, economic status, academic background, political affiliation, and faith. If you’re different, you’re going straight to hell and eternal damnation on a bullet train on greased rails. That’s why I left, running as fast and as far from that belief system as I could.
I loved reading A BIGGER TABLE. In it, John Pavlovitz blows those rigid myths right out of the water. The table is big enough for everyone. Regardless.
oday I saw a Facebook discussion on a meme that stated if your theology does not teach you to love more, you have the wrong theology. A person queried what ‘love’ is, noting it isn’t ‘comforting people in their sin,’ and went on to justify the judgment of sinners. Comments were bandied back and forth, justifying this and that, until someone said, “why don’t we just do it”–just love more.
As our society has become divided, so have our churches. We not only don’t talk to each other, we don’t even want to be associated with each other.
I may not talk about it directly, but my experience shows up now and then in my reviews. I am talking about my 38 years as a minister’s wife. My husband served twelve churches between 1972 and 2014, in the inner city and the suburbs and in small towns and resort towns.
The nature of the church changed hugely during these years, and not for the better. As churches competed for a limited number of church-goers, the press was for more ‘warm bodies,’ flashier worship, and expanded facilities. Generational differences created hard feelings over worship styles, hymns, and projected order of worship over bulletins.
The worst experience we had was at a church that actually divided. Members who had come from another faith background decided the denomination’s social principles were incompatible with their personal theology. They wrecked as much damage to the congregation and pastor as possible before leaving to start their own church.
I discovered John Pavlovitz when a Facebook friend shared his posts. I started reading his thoughts and found a kindred spirit. He wrote about how the contemporary Christian church had become politicized and was focused more on who was ‘out’ than on ministering to all our neighbors. He said it was alright if we have given up on organized religion.
Pavlovitz’s book A Bigger Table is the story of his faith journey. And it is about hospitality, welcoming everyone to the feast, the people we are uncomfortable with, the people we don’t always agree with, the people we have been told to avoid, and those condemned and cast into the outer darkness. By telling his story, Pavlovitz models spiritual growth. By telling stories of the people he met on his faith journey, he shows us that a bigger table may rock the boat, but better reflects the model of Jesus’ life.
Pavlovitz’s experience is not so different from mine. He grew up in a nice family. He was taught to avoid certain people. He went to art school in downtown Philadelphia and his experiences in the city, living among and working with a diversity of people, changed his life. As Philadelphia changed my life when we moved there in 1974. Like John, I found the experience was thrilling. I loved being around people who were different in their religion, ethnicity, and sexual orientation.
When Pavlovitz and his fiance wanted to be married, they found a United Methodist pastor who welcomed them. His spiritual life blossomed in that church and the pastor invited him to be a youth worker. I also loved working with youth myself! I loved their questioning, their openness, their desire to change the world.
Pavlovitz was called into ministry and he became involved with a megachurch until he was fired for not fitting in. He says it was the best thing to happen to him because he was freed from expectations. Pastors who want stability and a good salary don’t rock the boat. But to follow Jesus, we will rock the boat.
He was “emancipated from organized American Christianity” and freed to follow Jesus’ example of hospitality and inclusion, of listening to people instead of pontificating, of acceptance and not judgment.
Redemptive community, Pavlovitz writes, “means we endure the tension of creating peace for another while experiencing discomfort ourselves.”
I thought about a church whose sanctuary redecoration came to a grinding halt because the older folk wanted a “comfortable” bland space while the younger folk–who were doing the work–had presented a carefully considered decorating scheme in more vivid colors. It is just a small example of decisions made every day to protect our comfort over supporting visions for change.
Pavlovitz writes, “In fact, most of us who have experienced some disconnection with organized religion would name this as one of our core frustrations: we see Christians making little difference in the world, or making a difference that feels more like harm.”
We need to throw over results-based Christianity with the secular goals we have been embracing, Pavlovitz says, to concentrate on building community and supporting authenticity and staying in for the long haul.
Today, all around Metro Detroit churches are adopting radical hospitality, becoming reconciling churches to welcome LGBT, providing sanctuary for immigrants targeted by ICE, supporting the Muslim community, building tiny homes or providing free meals or hosting the homeless and food banks.
It gives me hope.
I received an ebook from the publisher through Edelweiss in exchange for a fair and unbiased review.