Her lips, the way she feels, how she moves against me. Her voice when she laughs, her eyes when she cries. Her soul connected to mine, for better or for worse, for all eternity.I don’t remember.A blank face. Unrecognizable. The darkness and impenetrable fog, day after day after day. Who am I? And for that matter, who is she?I can’t remember.Two sides of the same coin – one wants to remember, and … remember.
Two sides of the same coin – one wants to remember, and the other wants to stay forgotten. Which side will win? Can he trust his heart to bring him back to her? Or will she stay lost in the fog forever?
I might never remember.
more
What a beautiful heartbreaking, yet healing story. Jon overcomes so much and at times you don’t know if it should by Kitty or Delaney that make him whole again.
See more of my review here-https://youtu.be/CyCvPysAKlk
This was a pretty good story. I really felt for Jon/Jay. Everything he went through, his life before his accident, his life since the accident….. it was a wild ride. I read the authors note at the end and loved it. How the story came, how fast she wrote it, just pretty much all of it. Delaney was amazing. I love how laid back she was. I could sense her struggle but seeing her brace face in all of it made me love her that much more. Each scene was beautifully written and helped propel the story forward. It ended beautifully. I do wish he had gotten all his memories back of their love but it worked fine that he didn’t. 4 stars #2OCCJD
How can I i even start to make sense or describe this story .
The blurb didnt say much , so i just went in blind. The Best decision ever ! Cause i was surprised and elated then heartbroken, then hopeful and then blissed at all the turns this story meanders through.
I’m just numb from crying so hard. My heart is aching like a pulled muscle . It’s full of all the feels in CAPS, they crawl all over your body and penetrate the soul. The heart trembles with emotions and when it runneth over, they will ultimately flow through your eyes. Be prepared to fly sky high , then shatter to the ground and then try to make sense of it all. I’m just so overwhelmed and so happy that I got to read this book early.
Next time I go to NYC I will be inadvertently scanning the crowds near Time Square, to maybe catch a glimpse of my favouritest couple!
“Muscle memory, – That you could feel in your skin and your bones and your muscles ,even when your brain couldn’t.”
Heart being the strongest muscle in your body, it seals the emotions in its tight fist. You may be apart from the person you love, you may forget what they said, you may sometimes forget the faces , but you never forget how they made you feel. And that is the foundation of this amazing story . Jayson Fairbanks and Delaney Carter are in love. Stupid, head over heels, too absorbed into each other to notice their penury, dismal surroundings and their sorry state of addiction…..in Love
We had nothing. Nothing at all, barely two pennies to rub together, but we were happy. That’s true love.
Sensuality, aggression, pleasure, passion, dirty, raw, naughty, nasty, love.
Del is a Ray of sunshine breaking apart their dark shadowed life. Beautiful, full of Love and Joie De vivre
she had an exceptionally positive outlook on life. A spirit that was almost impossible to crush. Whenever anything bad happened, she could almost always find a silver lining. Find a way around it or through it, or a way to laugh at it and learn from it.
Pint size firebomb, she laughs as hard as she fights , or throws a tantrum. They’re infested with smooches, kisses , soul shattering sex and lust dipped Love . World is rosy , they’re high on Love , then joint, then speed. They Fly so high…………………………………………then Crash so bad, it kills them, their love, their life, their world, their existence.
I won’t give away anything else. Just that they cease to exist as Jayson and Delaney.
End of!
Stylo wrote neighbours and I became her fan. With MM I became her ardent , utmost, loyal admirer.
She spliced open my chest and stabbed my heart with all her words. I sobbed when I started the book, tore up when i was halfway through, howled to the sky when I finished it and a lump is stuck in my throat while writing this review.
A new string of adjectives will be needed to describe this beautiful story .
It’s the most heartfistingly achy-breaky story ever !! Drained of energy is how I feel now and reading common words seem sacrilegious after reading this tender , soulful story.
You can say it will easily climb to the #1 spot of this year . It will scar and stamp upon your heart.
I will never ever be able to forget Jayson and Del , they will stay trapped in my Muscle Memory FOREVER !!
5 Mood Ring Stars
Muscle Memory…it’s a very powerful thing. But the emotions that this phrase evokes in this book…gahhh! The feels.
Stylo Fantome has taken a person and turned them inside out. She stole their past and altered their future. What you don’t realize as the reader is that your happiness is contingent on their altered reality. However altered is no longer their preferred method of coping…for the most part.
This incredible let story left me a weepy mess. It also left me typing this up at 1:57 AM. I couldn’t put it down (mandatory pausing aside).
Everything pulls you in. Your disgust, curiosity, and the sweet awe at seeing “the one” will have you twisted up in knots. But stop thinking…stop forcing it…just relax and let it show you with muscle memory.
Reviewed for Sweet Spot Sisterhood
***5 ‘ In Love We Trust’ Stars***
The description of the book was the hook. I have read a few of the author’s books so I’m familiar with her style and diversity, but the description just did it for me. It peaked the curiosity of the beast in me that loves people watching and just seeing what their reactions will be to what is going on in front of them, add in the fact that our main character wakes up with full blown amnesia? That was like catnip to me. And what a rollercoaster of a ride Muscle Memory was in every way. I had ALL the FEELS. All of them. The good, the bad, the I want to gut someone with a spoon FEELS. I became fully invested in the characters and needed to see where this unorthodox journey would take them.
I’ve started, stopped and deleted this review so many times I swear I’m giving myself a complex and it’s not because the book was horrible, my rating proves it was the exact opposite. It’s simply that there is so much to gush about, but I don’t want to spoil any second of it because this is a book one needs to go into as blind as one possibly can. But if I don’t get the words out, I’ll go crazy so here goes nothing.
From the very beginning I loved the flow of the story. How we got to see and get to know Jon before and Jon in the present as he worked to figure out what and who he wanted to be in his new existence and see if he ever remembered who he used to be. And I have to say I liked both of Jon’s existences, I didn’t always agree with his choices in either ~ he stumbled a bit in both, but his soul was a good one. It was fascinating to see how he reacted to the various roadblocks in his journey and how, for the most part, he came out stronger once he navigated his way around them.
As for the girl in the fog. She is quite unique, as are all of Ms. Fantome’s women ~ at least the ones I’ve had a chance to meet. I loved her quirks and spirit, though I will admit I did have a few WTF moments with her, but her zest for life was like a beacon in the night and I couldn’t help but follow her where she went.
And then there is the love story and I’ll admit right here that it owned my heart. The FEELS were real, hell I did the whole tearing up sniffly thing while being pissed at the same time thing because one character was breaking my heart while I wanted to gut another with a spoon (This happen a few times so…). There were a lot of bumps in the road and a few times I growled at the characters, but in the end it showed that though the mind may forget and the heart may be wary, the soul never forgets what true love is.
I know this review is kinda verbal vomit-y and vague, but it is what it is. I was hooked from the start, and though there was a bit of a lull for me at one point, once I passed the 50% mark I didn’t want to put it down. The characters were all well written and had their own unique quirks. My favorite was Sloany. I seriously want to be her when I grow up. But overall this was a fun read that pulled out all the feels, and it quite possibly may be my favorite Stylo Fantome book to date!
~ Copy provided by Give Me Books Promotions & voluntarily reviewed ~
“Because when true love finds its counterpart, it always recognizes it.”
Thank you, Stylo, for not writing cookie cutter characters that fit a certain mold. Your characters, they break them. Thank you, Stylo, for writing real people with real problems and you’re not afraid to put it out there despite what people may say. This story was amazingly different and I loved every freaking minute of it. I love how it made me think about if what happened to Jay/Jon happened to me? Seriously, what would I do? It’s so crazy because it’s real and happens! I mean, probably not the drugs and other stuff…but you never know!
It’s refreshing to read about 2 people that are a hot mess, live life on the edge, barely have 2 coins to rub together, can’t keep a job, squat, party way too much but love each other beyond that. It certainly wasn’t the healthiest of relationships but at least Jay wanted better for both of them, eventually.
I’m not going to go into the storyline but all I will say is, if you’re not into real life problems and a OW kinda triangle thingy in your fictional reading world, then this book most likely will not be your jam girlfriend, and that’s cool. That stuff doesn’t bother me personally because all bets are off (as long as everyone is legal) in my fake reading world. I love giving “different” a shot, you never know when it will turn into your next awesome read.
“My brain couldn’t remember,” he said. “And my heart wasn’t sure. But my soul … how could I ever forget it belongs to you?” Heart eyes!
SIX AMAZING STARS!!!!
While recommending this book to a friend I told her it had all the “feels” we Romance lovers want in a book. Muscle Memory will make my Top Ten list of 2017, and I’m pretty confident it will be among the top three, that’s how much I loved it! Ms. Fantome’s writing is so poignant I felt genuine, sharp stabs of pain in my chest. It goes from past to present, back and forth, carrying us along this hauntingly beautiful story, making us feel every single thing. It’s a gift not many authors have, this eloquent way with words that we are so very fortunate to experience. This book had me crying (sobbing, really) at times out of sadness and joy. For the angst lovers, this book delivers! Luckily for us, it’s a true Romance, so don’t be afraid to dive in. You won’t be disappointed; the epilogue is a thing of beauty, deep-sigh worthy!
What would you do if you were inadvertently given a second chance at a new life, a clean slate, so to speak? What if, in order to start all over again, you had your memory wiped away? Everyone you knew, everything you knew, all taken away, in a blink of an eye. No clue to who you were, where you came from, who loved you and who you loved. It would be terrifying, to wake up, having lost your memory and yourself.
John Doe, case number 438643, wakes up in Lenox Hill Hospital in New York asking a nurse if she could tell him who he is. He was transferred there from an Emergency room in Brooklyn, having fallen/pushed/jumped off a subway platform, the police were unsure how he was injured. So, when he finally woke up, he remembered nothing. Not only the details of how he was injured, but he couldn’t remember who he was, either. Name, age, date of birth, family…nothing. He has retrograde amnesia, caused by brain trauma, due to his accident.
“You could’ve died. You were waiting for the L at Bedford Avenue when you fell of the platform, went down almost four feet straight onto your head. Cracked your skull open on the tracks and broke your arm. You’re lucky a train wasn’t coming, either. Caused quite a problem, shut down the lines for a couple hours.”
“I just…fell?”
“You were probably high. You’re almost lucky in a way, I bet you didn’t feel a thing.”
“I don’t get it. How can I not remember doing drugs? Shouldn’t I be jonesing or something?”
“You were unconscious for over two weeks, honey. You detoxed while you were out, which trust me, makes you one of the lucky ones.”
So Jon Doherty (he decides he wants that name instead of John Doe) must have been homeless from what he can tell of the picture of him when he was admitted. It seems he was a drug addict, with dreadlocks and tattoos. He wished he knew what his tattoos meant to him, especially the one written in Latin, that a doctor tells him means “In Love We Trust”.
With no wallet or ID, the police check his prints and find no criminal past that could identify him. Well, that’s both good and bad. After news coverage, on TV and print, no one comes forward to help identify him. Seems no one is looking for him or seems to know him. Seeing his reflection in the mirror, he looks nothing like when he was brought in. After the news coverage he was set up a with a donation fund so he has money to start a new life. His social worker, Mrs. Sloan, has assured him she’ll help him once he’s released from the hospital. His doctor gives him some advice he takes to heart.
“Then think of this as a fresh start, Jon, The man they brought into me three weeks ago had looked like a train wreck. But the man sitting in front of me right now, he seems pretty smart. Do something with this, make sure not to go down the same path.”
Although he can’t remember anything about it, Jon had a past life and someone he shared it with. Someone who knew and loved him when he was Jayson “Jay” Fairbanks. Someone he trusted and told every single thing about his life to. Someone he thought was his entire world at one time.
“And my heart and my soul and my everything”
Delaney Carter had good intentions of going to beauty school in New York having moved there from Connecticut. After seeing Jay one night she runs after him, hoping to score drugs, and he turns her life upside down.
“I want to know everything about you.
And what about the love of your life? You didn’t answer that question—I want to hear all about her.”
“She’s a crazy girl from Connecticut who seems like the girl next door, but fucks like the bad girl from the other side of the tracks. Just looking at her turns me inside out and I swear, I’m going to fucking marry her someday.”
“And when you finally ask her, she will definitely fucking say yes.”
Or maybe Del is the one that turns his life upside down. It’s hard to tell, their attraction is so explosive and intense. With Jay dealing drugs and both of them consuming, it’s hard to keep a steady job. Or a place to stay. But this was all in the past….
Once Sloany, as Jon calls Mrs. Sloan, finds a half-way house for him to live in she finds a part time job at a community center. When his supervisor, Katherine “Kitty” Beaumont, shows an interest in Jon and takes him under her wing, all he can do is go along.
Every now and then, Jon has a flash of something that he refers to as a muscle memory. Not quite clear enough, a familiarity. The smell of cigarette smoke. Words or a certain term will give him a strange feeling in the center of his chest.
Delaney was his past and Jay had promised her a future together. Too bad he couldn’t remember his promise to her. Kitty was his present, but something, or a feeling, was holding Jon back.
This story slayed me! When Jon crashes into his past, the heartbreak I felt for everyone involved was just so incredibly painful. All he knows of Delany is that they were homeless and did drugs together. He had no idea who or what she meant to him. She had his past and he needed to know more in order to move on. But somethings were too sacred to Del, and Jay, to tell Jon about.
Who loves more, the one who selfishly refuses to let go of a loved one, despite knowing the hurt they’re causing others? Or the one who selflessly lets a loved one go no matter how painful it might be? Would you stay in someone’s life, no matter how hurtful it was to see them with someone else, as long as they were happy? Would you be capable of cruelly saying words to someone, words meant to cause excruciating pain? To the point they’d wish they’d died, knowing the words were a lie?
“I’m glad I forgot us”
There were moments I felt such rage I wanted to scream or strike someone, anyone! And others that made me cry tears of joy, sorrow and even laughter. Like I mentioned above, all the FEELS!
As a side note: Ms. Fantome has one of my favorite songs listed on the playlist. It’s a song that is so hauntingly beautiful and fits this story so well, sung by a certain Bahamian songstress. I’ll think of this story every time I hear that song. No, that’s not true. I’ll think of this story, just because it buried itself in my heart, and I love it so much!
I fell in love with the “Kane trilogy” and had to read more of this author.
H has a horrible accident and suffers with amnesia. He gets small glimpses of memories but nothing concrete. He does remember feelings and passion though.
He works to find a place between who he was (a homeless druggie) and who he is now (a clean cut writer).
It is a great emotional read. Very well done
While I have several of Stylo Fantome’s books on my kindle to be read, this was actually my first.
I struggled a bit for the first 50% because of the jumping back and forth between the past and present but I know the author was working hard to get us all the background.
What would it be like to wake up one day with absolutely no memory of who you are? This is Jon.
What would it be like, after that night, to be separated from the love of your life and not be able to find out from anyone where they took him, was he alive or dead, where else do I look? This is Delaney.
Crazy…and then, it happens.
The feels in this book are beyond description, my heart shattered into a million pieces and I cried, because the story was so well written it wasn’t even a stretch to be transported right into the center of all their unbelievable pain. Delaney was strong and resilient and her character definitely made this book enjoyable for me.
Even though it’s my first, it definitely won’t be my last by this author, I highly recommend Muscle Memory.