The only thing in Colin Mulligan’s life that makes sense is taking cars apart and putting them back together. In the auto shop where he works with his father and brothers, he tries to get through the day without having a panic attack or flying into a rage. Drinking helps. So does running and lifting weights until he can hardly stand. But none of it can change the fact that he’s gay, a secret he … he has kept from everyone.
Rafael Guerrera has found ways to live with the past he’s ashamed of. He’s dedicated his life to social justice work and to helping youth who, like him, had very little growing up. He has no time for love. Hell, he barely has time for himself. Somehow, everything about miserable, self-destructive Colin cries out to him. But down that path lie the troubles Rafe has worked so hard to leave behind. And as their relationship intensifies, Rafe and Colin are forced to dredge up secrets that both men would prefer stay buried.
What readers are saying:
“Redeeming a villain isn’t always easy, but Parrish does a great job with that here. I am really a big fan of this series and I am dying for the next book!” —Joyfully Jay
“This is an absolute read-this-the-fuck-now book. I loved everything about it. I loved it as much as I loved the first book and cannot WAIT to read it again.” —Gay Book Reviews
“This book was such an incredible read that I find myself still thinking about. I highly recommend it!” —Sinfully Gay Romance Book Reviews
“One of the best books I have read in a long time. A book I will read over and over again and never get bored.” —A reader
“A beautiful, poignant, emotional, sexy, passionate and a truly entertaining read.” —A reader
“Brace yourself, this book was so amazing. Roan Parrish is definitely a force to be reckoned with.” —A reader
more
This book could be read as a stand-alone, I think, although it is richer for having first read In the Middle of Somewhere – book 1 with Daniel – which I also enjoyed a lot. The two stories run partially in parallel, and having seen the Mulligan family through Daniel’s eyes helps you weigh what you are presented with through Colin’s.
Colin as a mess. He’s a man who was so desperate for his father’s approval that he buried his true self so deep he’s a shell. Even he can barely tell anything exists beyond the two-dimensional guy who gets up, goes to work, fixes cars, and goes home. He drinks, and lives moment to moment, because he can’t let anything slip from his control. He’s been awful to his brother Daniel since the moment Daniel came out as gay. And that’s only livable if he hates himself for being gay. So he cycles through self-loathing and panic and anger. It’s not pretty.
Rafe Guerrera is in some ways his opposite. He’s tightly controlled, because a past full of mistakes is waiting to drag him down if he loses control. But as long as he can keep it, he’s doing well, making a difference with LGBT youth, a long way from the gutter he was headed for years ago. What he doesn’t have is an adult to really share the load, to let him unwind and be less than perfect. And he has a lot of buried grief for the recent death of his mentor, and some regrets he’s carrying that weigh on him.
They are potentially really wrong for each other – Rafe’s out gay life could destroy Colin’s closet. Colin’s despair, his drinking, his self-focused pain, could bring Rafe’s clean new life down. But they are attracted, interested, and unable to walk away. It’s a crash of some kind, waiting to happen.
This story is angsty, with a very self-destructive MC. The plot is not melodramatic despite that. There’s pain and anger and mistakes that are devastating, but all within a plausible framework. I even liked this one even more than the first.
A realistic portrayal of how difficult being queer can be amongst unsupportive family and friends. Be prepared to be emotionally destroyed, but it’s well worth it.
Do you ever read a book and utterly hate a character? That was me about Colin in book one of this trilogy, Middle of Somewhere. Honestly, I went back and forth a lot about if I even wanted to read this book because I didn’t see how Colin could redeem himself from all the awful things he said about Daniel. When I started this book it honestly wasn’t working in Colin’s favor and there were several times, I almost stopped reading but Rafe came in and changed everything.
Rafe was this shining beacon of hope on Colin from the moment he stepped in to help Colin out after things getting out of hand at a bar. Seemingly Rafe has everything going for him but that is far from true, an ex-convict who works with LGBTQ+ youth he has tried to do everything he can to leave his past behind him. Now, meeting Colin and being unable to stay away Rafe notices a likeness in him that isn’t sure he likes. After being clean for song long Rafe can’t be around someone who is drinking the way Colin is and he isn’t sure how much longer he can hang on and still keep his sobriety intact.
“Armor’s not dangerous. That’s for survival. It’s weapons you have to watch out for. And you—” He strokes my lips with his thumb. “It’s mostly armor, Colin. And when you’re with me, the armor falls away. Who you are without it… it’s beautiful.”
Colin works at his Dad’s auto shop and it is one of the few things that can keep the anxiety at bay. The only other being running, lifting weights or the drinking. Being closed his whole life puts a whole new level of pressure on him because his brother is openly gay. He is jealous of the life his brother gets to lead while he has to be someone, he isn’t so that he won’t disappoint his father. He has seen how his father looks at his brother and he never wants to see that look in his father’s eyes when it comes to him. When tragedy strikes Rafe is the only person that Colin wants to cling to, but he can’t because no one in his family knows he is out.
Somewhere along the line I fell in love with Colin’s story. I do not like or condone his actions and words towards his brother, but Roan Parrish created such a heartbreaking story about a guy who never felt like he belonged until one person showed him that he did. Never did I think I would be rooting for Colin’s happiness the way I was through this story. When life looks bleak and you are left with nothing sometimes all it takes is that one person to reach out and tell you that you are worth it.
Out of Nowhere (Middle of Somewhere, #2) Roan Parrish – Not gonna lie to you, I wasn’t looking forward to this one. Roan Parrish did such a good job making me not like Colin because of how he treated Daniel that it took me a hot minute to get into this one. But I did like Rafe! By the time I got about halfway through this, I was cheering for Colin too! Happy Reading!
**PARTIAL SPOILERS**
Holy guacamole, this book WRECKED ME! Hats off to Roan Parrish for turning Colin into this character for which I feel so much empathy. Having been previously introduced to him through In the Middle of Somewhere, I recall thinking “there’s more to this guys story.” And boy, did Parrish deliver. Being in the closet, and having an immense amount of self-hatred is enough to make a person miserable, but it never excuses abuse – which is what I would call what Colin did to his younger brother, Daniel. However! This redemption arc is so deep, so layered with pain and deep-seeded shame, that you can’t help but realize why Colin has been such a terrible person for so long. Rafe is an amazing character, and I love that BOTH he and Colin learn to see themselves through each others eyes. Marvelous. Gut-wrenching. Incapable of putting down. Can’t wait for the next one.
I loved the depth Colin and Rafe ended up in love with each other. I hated the pain they both went through getting to that point. Homophobia is such a vile form of self-hatred. It twists the person in such ways that they pull away from family, friends and those who could love them.
I hate the ‘social’ services mantra that anyone who has broken the law must be kept away from anyone younger than themselves. Like they don’t have the ability to see the good in someone and can’t learn from those who have made mistakes in the past. What a narrow minded, self-righteous way of looking at life!
Hopefully this will change. Jaime Reese’s ‘The Men of Halfway House’ is the perfect example of how those who have ‘walked the walk’ can legitimately ‘talk the talk.’
One of the best books ever!
In my top 10 of 2016
Wow! There were so many feelings in this book, and it just touched my heart, it was so beautifully written.