Warning: This dark erotic tale contains violence, explicit sexuality, and adult situations. The content may be considered objectionable, so please read at your own discretion.This is not a love story.A chance encounter in a dark bar changed my life forever. I’ll never forget the events of that night and the days that followed. I’ll never be the same. He tried to break me, but now I’m stronger … now I’m stronger than ever.
I want him to pay. I want him to suffer. I want to be just as much of a monster as he is.
But maybe, deep down… I want him just as much as he wants me. Maybe we deserve each other. Maybe he knows me better than I know myself.
Maybe.
But I know what love is, and this is not it.
For Mature Readers Only.
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The title is a disguise of this book, it is actually a holy-fuck-my-morals-are-tarnished kind of book. This book has toxicity galore, the characters are not merely obsession, I think their minds are what humans really feel but is hidden in one dark corner of the mind which we fear to show because otherwise people will call you insane. I thought I started a book with no romance and the author said this book has no romance but can you name this toxicity a romance? To dark romance readers, this story is an unique gem, this book won’t make you sweat by rethink your morals.
Joan and Elliot were typical normal people with normal activities of life. They change or they are what they are when they meet; very different from normal people. On a normal day Joan was out having fun and looking out for a quick lay, which suddenly turns drastic when she was raped in the washroom. Her rapist was also her obsessed stalker, who was lucky to find his victim alone that day. Elliot thought after fucking Joan his obsession for her was over, but after he left her and found her walking down the street hunched and alone once again he realised he cannot let her go. He keeps her captive but she manages to run away. Two years later Joan tries to move on. She has a steady relationship and is about to marry but there is a niggling inch she cannot seem to scratch – her time spent with the rapist; she goes back to search for him starting something they unknowingly wanted.
‘He knows the dirty parts, the ugly parts, the crazy parts, because he’s bred and fostered them in me. And he loves me anyway.
I also know all of his bad parts. I know what to expect. I don’t fear him anymore.
In a lot of ways, I’m his mirror, and he’s mine.’
“Elliot has that maniac glint…” these words gets me everytime. Elliot is a construction worker, he is large and women fall for his looks. He is a crazy sociopath, he cannot overlook or think beyond loving, obsessing or fucking Joan. Joan has been his captive and slave, but for all intents and purpose she helps him escape jail and keeps him hidden. Elliot never fears getting caught, his crimes are mostly done in the open. He rapes her in the club bathroom, drags her to his house, stabs her fianće in her house leaving proofs which could be easily identified. In the end he ends up in jail. What’s interesting, Joan plays the victim role, yes she is mad and wants Elliot to suffer for raping her. To the world they are rapist and victim but both have a secret which they share only – Joan craves Eliot as much as he craves her.
I wonder who is crazy and unstable more, Elliot or Joan?
I keep thinking one day I’ll find triggers that get too uncomfortable to read, but I haven’t yet!! This is definitely one hell of a dark read and I loved it! I didn’t realize kidnapping would be a trope for me, but it is. My emotions were all over the place from beginning to end. I had a hard time putting this down because I needed to know where he was at all times. Stockholm syndrome at its finest, and the punishments she serves him back were almost freeing in a way! damn it was a book I never knew I needed until I read it!
Absolutely mind the trigger warnings, you’ve been warned!
Definitely a taboo subject, but if you have no triggers, you’ll do just fine. Considering how this book could have gone, I’d put this as a grey. It’s not all light and fluffy, but it isn’t that dark either. The steamy scenes get kinda repetitive. They’re still hot, but you won’t miss anything by skimming. Give it a chance. You won’t regret it!